


Who Are You?...Who Am I?

by GeesCLUELESSgirl



Category: Fall Out Boy- Minor, My Chemical Romance
Genre: Amnesia, Creepy messages, Fear, Fluff, M/M, Memories, Missing Person- Found, Nightmares, Panic Attacks, Rape trauma, Smut, Surprise Ending, Trauma, Traveling, being watched, getting to know each other again, injuries, soft smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-19
Updated: 2018-03-15
Packaged: 2019-03-06 22:49:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 9
Words: 29,706
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13421256
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GeesCLUELESSgirl/pseuds/GeesCLUELESSgirl
Summary: When a young man staggers into the ER of a small country hospital, head wound and no memory, no ID, and soon; no consciousness...police take fingerprints and it turns out there is a missing person’s report out on him from five years ago, placed by his fiancé.The head wound's not really major, but the memory loss is almost total.His fiancé takes him home and tries to get him to remember him, and whatever happened during his five year absence.What DID happen while he was gone?...and what will happen when those five years come back to haunt him?…………………………………………………………………………





	1. 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hi there chipmunks, how’s you? 
> 
> So this is a fic that I started over on MCRFF over two years ago, but a major writer's block along with life and other things made me put this on hiatus about a year ago. 
> 
> I have decided to pick this fic back up and started off by completely re-editing what I’d already got written, before continuing the story. I have gotten a large amount more written in the last couple weeks, and I’ve decided it’s time to begin putting this up. I plan to update every Friday, so I hope you enjoy it.
> 
> Please comment if you like it, but if you only wanna throw hate...then please don’t waste your time or mine.
> 
>  
> 
> …………………………………………………………………………

 

It was 3:30 in the morning when the doors to the Star Valley Medical Centre in Afton Wyoming opened, and a young man stumbled inside. He was wearing a torn pair of grey sweatpants, and nothing else, not even shoes.  
There was blood down the left side of his thin face, and through his long brown hair. His eyes were glassy and bloodshot, and there were cuts and bruises over most of his visible skin.  
As he staggered up to the reception desk, the nurse, busy typing on her computer, spoke without looking up.

"Good evening. How can I help you?"

The man leaned his hands on the desk.

"H-help m-me."

The nurse looked up just in time to see the man collapse to the ground, his dull hazel eyes rolling back in his head. She dashed out from behind her desk, calling behind her for assistance.

"Some help please?"

Two more nurses ran out from the back room and the three of them crowded around the unconscious man as he began to convulse violently.

"Maggie, fetch Dr. Write..." 

The senior nurse ordered.

"June, grab the oxygen."

"Yes Sister." 

They murmured as they stood and hurried away.

"Sir?...Sir, can you hear me?..." 

No reply as he continued to seize.

"We've got you sir...you're gonna be alright."

_~Time Lapse~about an hour later~_

Two officers from the Afton P.D arrived at the Centre.

"Hello?..." 

Sergeant Mathews said to the nurse, back behind her desk. She looked up and smiled.

"We're here about the John Doe."

Nurse Maggie nodded.

"Of course, follow me..." 

She lead them through a set of double doors to the Emergency Assessment Unit.

"He's right in here. I'll let the doctor know you've arrived." 

Then she turned and left the room, returning to her desk. The two officers waited patiently for the doctor to come. They could see who they presumed to be the patient, laying on a bed in the corner. He was asleep, or unconscious, and there was a large white bandage wrapped around his head. There were also bruises and other dressings covering whatever else they could see. He was a mess! 

"Officers..." 

Dr. Write said as he entered the room, glasses perched on the tip of his nose and a clipboard in his hand.

"This is our John Doe..." 

He stated, pointing to the man on the bed.

"He arrived at around 3:30am with a head injury that appeared to be quite severe. He then collapsed and started to seize..." 

He looked up from his papers.

"We ran several tests and determined that it wasn't as bad as we thought, but when the young man regained consciousness, he wasn't able to tell us who he is, or what happened to him. On top of many minor injuries, including some broken ribs and a lot of bruising, he appears to have been sexually assaulted multiple times, though from the rape-kit that was performed, condoms must have been used as there was no DNA samples beside his own. The main problem we have though, is that he seems to be suffering from amnesia, which is why we called you. He had no I.D on him, and we need to know a name so we can treat him properly."

The officers nodded.

"We'll take his fingerprints. If he's in the system, we should have a name for you in a couple of hours."

The doctor nodded, then left them to it. Once the officers had the man's prints, they walked out of the room, passing the doctor just outside.

"We'll be back as soon as we know anything." 

The second officer said, and then they left. A groan came from within the room, and Dr. Write went back inside.

"W-where am I?" 

The man coughed out, looking around with confused eyes.

"You're in the hospital. Do you remember your name? Or what happened to you?..." 

The young man frowned as he tried to think, then shook his head slightly, meeting the doctor's eyes with a scared gaze.

"Alright. Just try to relax, we're doing everything we can to help you, and we _will_ find out who you are...so don't worry, ok?..." 

The man nodded, visibly deflating.

"Why don't you close your eyes and try to get some sleep. As soon as we have news, we'll let you know."

The man yawned slightly, then nodded.

"O-ok..." 

He stuttered.

"I'll t-try."

He closed his tired eyes and listened as the doctor walked back out of the room, then he opened them again. He knew he wouldn't be able to sleep, but that was possibly the only thing he _did_ know about himself. But then, who could sleep when they had no idea who they were, or how they'd ended up in a hospital reception, at 3:30am looking like they'd been hit by a train.  
No...for this unnamed young man, sleep was a long, long ways away.

*  
*  
*

 

Sergeant Mathews walked into the tech room, his deputy following behind.

"Hey Sarah. Anything on those prints yet?"

The dark haired girl looked up from her computer, an unreadable expression on her young face.

"Hi Butch..." 

Her eyes met with the deputy's and lit up.

"Paul..." 

Everyone in the station knew those two were at it like rabbits, they weren't that good at hiding it. After a heartbeat, Sarah snapped back to the task at hand, a blush colouring her cheeks.

"Oh yes. The err...prints. Yes..." 

She turned back to her desktop and typed a few keys, before reading off the results.

"The system came back with details of a missing person's case filed in Belleville New Jersey, back in 2012. The guy's name was Gerard Arthur Way, 20 years old. It was filed by his fiancé, a Frank Iero. Mr. Iero had returned from work on Friday January 18th, to find the apartment they shared had been trashed, and Mr. Way nowhere to be found. The local police were called in, and while forensics were doing their job, blood was found..." 

Sarah looked up.

"There was never a ransom demand. No contact was ever made. Of course, they looked at Mr. Iero as a suspect, but he had an alibi and no motive. There were a few clues left at the scene, but the trail ran cold pretty quickly. The case was filed away and forgotten...til now."

"So..." 

Sergeant Mathews surmised.

"The guy with no memory is a missing person from five years, and more than 2000 miles away?..." 

Sarah nodded.

"Wow! Can you print up the details for me?...I'm going to phone the Belleville P.D."

"Will do." 

Sarah smiled, turning back to her computer.  
Sergeant Butch Mathews and Deputy Paul Adler left the room and walked down the quiet hallway. It was a little after 7am, and it wouldn't be quiet for much longer. Butch liked this time of the morning. He liked the calm before the storm. Things would always pick up a bit after 8.

Entering his office, Butch flopped into his desk chair and groaned. His back had been playing him up lately, but he never could find the time to get it checked out.

"Paul?..." 

The younger man hummed from the doorway.

"Could you get me a coffee please? Oh, and a couple Tylenol?" 

Paul nodded then disappeared out the door, closing it softly behind him. Butch picked up his phone and dialled directory inquiries. After three rings, a woman with a deep Southern accent answered the call.

"Hello. Directory inquiries. How can I help you?"

"Oh yes, good morning..." 

Butch greeted her.

"I need the phone number for the police department in Belleville New Jersey, please." 

He heard tapping on a keyboard, then the woman's voice returned.

"Belleville, New Jersey police department, 152 Washington Avenue, telephone number is...area code 973, number 450-3334. Would you like me to repeat that?"

Butch smiled and shook his head, though he knew she couldn't see him.

"No, thank you. I got it. Have a nice day." 

Then he hung up, and dialled the number he'd scribbled down. After nearly a minute, someone answered.

"G'morning. Belleville police department, officer Willis speaking, how can I help ya?" 

The man's strong Jersey accent and deep voice took Butch by surprise slightly.

"Yes, good morning. I'm Sergeant Mathews, from Afton Wyoming police department. I have a case that seems to trace back to Belleville, and I was hoping I could speak to a Detective Nick Stokes, if he still works there?"

"Oh yes, though he's not a Detective any more, he's Captain now...I'll just see if he's in. Hold the line please?..." 

The officer placed the call on hold, and Butch listened as some random instrumental piece played quietly in his ear. After a moment, the music stopped and officer Willis returned.

"Hello?...Yes, Captain Stokes is in. I'll just transfer you. Hold the line."

There was a small clicking sound, then a different voice met Butch's ear. It was a smooth, more Southern voice. Texas, or California maybe? Butch was never that good with accents.

"Good morning. Sergeant Mathews was it?"

"Yes. Good morning."

"So Matt tells me you have a case that connects here?"

"Yes..." 

Butch breathed, glancing down at the file in front of him, and startling slightly when he saw a mug of coffee and a packet of painkillers on his desk. He looked up, but the door was closed and he was alone. When did Paul come in? Shaking off his own question, he went quickly back to the phone call.

"We had a call from the local hospital in the middle of the night. They had a John Doe wander in and collapse. He seemed to have amnesia, so we took fingerprints and checked to see if he's in the system..." 

He took a sip of coffee.

"It turns out that he is a missing person from Belleville...a case that you handled 5 years ago."

"Really?..." 

Captain Stokes sounded surprised.

"What was the name?"

Butch looked down at the file.

"Gerard Arthur Way. Do you remember the case?"

"Yes, I do..." 

The Captain said with a surprised tone.

"It was the first case I ever took lead on actually..." 

Butch heard clicks on a keyboard.

"I was annoyed that I couldn't close the case."

Butch grinned.

"Well, I don't know where he's been for the last five years, but I know where he is now..." 

He clicked his own keyboard.

"I'll send you all the details I have. I was hoping you would be able to contact his family?...his fiancé?"

"Sure..." 

Stokes said.

"His fiancé never really gave up looking. Still comes in here once a month to ask if there are any new leads...it's upsetting to have to tell him no every time."

Butch sympathised.

"I can imagine. Well, now you got something to tell him."

Captain Stokes nodded, clicking on the file as it appeared on his screen.

"I have the file..." 

He scanned the report.

"Shit!...he went through Hell, huh?!"

"Yeah, I'd say so..." 

Butch replied.

"Well, I better go. I gotta go back to the hospital and let them know who he is."

"Ok then..." 

Stokes said.

"I'll go visit Mr. Iero. Don't be surprised if he turns up there."

Butch laughed slightly.

"Yeah, I kinda thought he might. Well, bye for now. If we turn up anything on where he's been, I'll let you know."

They said their good byes, then hung up.  
Butch popped two Tylenol tabs into his mouth and washed them down with the last of his almost cold coffee, then sighed and got up to leave, grabbing his jacket and keys before opening the door and stepping out into the already slightly busier hallway.  
Paul was standing talking to another officer, who Butch didn't recognise, but as soon as he saw his superior, he excused himself from the conversation and followed him out to the car.  
Ten minutes later, they pulled up outside the Medical Center, and headed inside. The same nurse was on reception.

"Hello again."

The nurse looked up and smiled brightly.

"Hi there. Back so soon?"

Butch grinned at her. She reminded him of his eldest daughter, Katherine...though his girl had chosen to become a tattoo artist down in LA, instead of getting a proper job.

"Yes...we have a name for your John Doe."

"That was quick!..." 

The nurse said, her eyebrows raising.

"I'll call Dr. Write. Please take a seat." 

She pointed to the chairs in the waiting area, then paged the doctor.  
Ten minutes later, Dr. Write walked up to the two police men.

"Gentlemen, Maggie says you have a name for us?"

Butch nodded, standing from the uncomfortable plastic chair and shaking the doctor's hand.

"Yes. His name is Gerard Arthur Way, born April 9th 1991 in Belleville New Jersey. He's been missing for five years...presumed kidnapped, and dead."

"Really?..." 

The doctor looked taken aback, though considering the state his patient was in when he'd arrived, he probably shouldn't be so shocked.

"Have you contacted his next of kin?"

Butch nodded.

"I called the detective who dealt with the case, and he's going to go visit them."

"Ok..." 

Dr. Write nodded.

"Let's go give him his name back..." 

The three men walked through to the EAU, but found the young man apparently asleep. Backing out quietly, the doctor smiled.

"I'll tell him when he wakes up."

The sergeant and his deputy said good bye and left the Centre, off to look for anything that might help them to find out just what had happened during those five missing years, and where Gerard Way had been.  
The doctor went to look up Gerard's notes, and Gerard, though he was still unaware that that was his name, lay staring at the ceiling...still unable to sleep.

*  
*  
*

2,165 miles away, Captain Nick Stokes was knocking on Frank Iero's front door. He heard quiet footsteps from inside, then the smaller man opened the door to him, a confused look on his face.

"Nick?...what're you doing here?"

Nick grinned.

"Good news..." 

He saw Frank's breath hitch, and his eyes widen.

"He's been found!"

Frank...fainted!


	2. 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frank travels to Gerard...but it’s not the perfect reunion.
> 
>  
> 
> ………………………………………………………………………

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys, how’s you? 
> 
> So I know it’s not long since I put up the first chapter of this, but I decided to give you another. Hope you enjoy.
> 
>  
> 
> ………………………………………………………………………

 

Once Frank had come around, and Captain Stokes had given him all the information he had, and left, Frank rushed to his bedroom and grabbed a backpack from the top shelf of his closet, and started shoving clothes into it, his cellphone trapped awkwardly between his shoulder and his ear as he waited on hold to book his plane ticket.  
His heart was racing and he was pretty sure he was gonna puke from stress, but he didn't care. Gerard had been found!...His Gerard!...His Gee!...The love of his fucking life!

Nick hadn't been able to tell him much, just that he'd been found in some Jerkwater town in Wyoming, and that he had amnesia. Would he remember Frank?...their lives together?...what they meant to one another?

"Hello, how can I help you?" 

The voice in his ear caught him by surprise and he nearly dropped the cell as he fumbled to answer.

"Oh yes...err...hello. I need to book a ticket from Teterboro airport New Jersey, to Afton municipal airport Wyoming. ASAP."

He heard tapping on a keyboard, then the woman's voice returned.

"There is a flight leaving from Teterboro in two hours time, and there are several available seats. Did you require a return flight?"

Frank thought for a second. He didn't know how long Gerard would have to stay in hospital.

"No, thank you. I don't know how long I'll be staying, so I'll just get one-way for now, and sort out my return when I'm ready."

The woman told him the price, and Frank paid with his credit card.

"Your ticket will be waiting for you at check-in. Have a nice day sir."

"You too. Thank you." 

Frank hung up and slipped the cell into his pocket as he checked that he had everything. He'd never been to Wyoming, but he knew that it could be pretty cold this time of year, so he'd packed hoodies and thick socks for the trip.  
Grabbing his keys off the hook by the door, and swinging the backpack over his shoulder, Frank left his little house and got in his car for the 15 minute drive to the airport.  
Traffic was surprisingly light, and he found a parking spot within 5 minutes of arriving. He grabbed his bag, locked his car, and headed inside. Once he had his ticket, Frank sat down on an uncomfortable metal bench and waited. He had just over an hour to wait, and his stomach felt like he'd drunk a gallon of battery acid. Trying to relax slightly, Frank realised that he could be doing something useful right now. Pulling his cell from his pocket, he dialled an old, but familiar number. The phone rang 3 times, then went to voicemail.

"Hi. You've reached the voicemail for Mikey Way and Pete Wentz. Sorry we're not here right now, but we're on vacation, so screw you!...we don't have to answer!..." 

Mikey's voice sounded down the line, Pete giggling in the background.

"Leave us a message after the beep, and if we like you, we'll call you back!"

There was some giggling and shuffling noises, then Pete's voice came through.

"Or maybe not...See ya!" 

Then Frank heard the beep. He shook his head, rolling his eyes.

"Err...hey guys, it's Frank. I know it's been a while since we spoke, and again, I'm really sorry for what I said, but you really need to call me back. Gee's been found, and I'm on my way to him now. So please call?...and I'll fill you in..." 

He wasn't sure what else to say. It had been nearly a year since he'd spoken to them last.

"Well, talk to you soon, I guess. Bye." 

Then he hung up and put his phone back in his pocket.  
The wait seemed to fly by after that, and soon he was boarding the plane, headed for Afton. He found his seat and sat down, trying to get comfy. His bad stomach was not helping.  
A young woman, probably late teens or early twenties, sat down next to him and offered him a friendly smile. They sat in silence for a while, then the girl turned toward him.

"Hi. I'm Hayley."

"Frank..." 

Hayley must've seen Frank's distress, cause she asked him if he was ok.

"No, not really."

"I'm a good listener."

She stated, smiling gently at him. Frank sighed. Where to begin.

"I'm on my way to see my fiancé, who disappeared 5 years ago."

"Disappeared?..." 

Hayley gasped, her eyebrows shooting up.

"What happened?"

Frank took a breath. He'd told this so many times over the last few years, that it was almost a memorised speech now. One more time wouldn't hurt.

"Gerard and I were together since he started middle school, just friends at first of course, but I asked him out his first year of Highschool, and he said yes. We were one of those sickeningly sweet couples that hold hands, and never fight..." 

Frank chuckled at the memory and Hayley smiled, politely.

"Just after he graduated, I proposed, and again he said yes!...I couldn't believe I'd gotten so lucky. Gee was perfect. He was smart, funny, talented and gorgeous. He was also super shy, and very humble. It took a lot to make him believe me when I told him that he was beautiful. But he was..." 

Frank pulled out his wallet and showed Hayley a photograph of him and Gerard, taken just a week before the younger man went missing. Hayley smiled at the picture, then handed it back. Frank stared at it for a moment, even though he had every line, every curve, and every inch of that picture imprinted in his brain.

"I came home from work one day and found our apartment trashed, and Gerard gone. I called his cell, but it went to voicemail. I called his brother, Mikey, but he'd not seen him..." 

A tear slipped from Frank's eye and he ignored it, continuing to gaze at the picture.

"I called the police and they came to investigate what appeared to be a break-in. At first, they said that Gee couldn't be classed as a missing person, cause it had only been a few hours...but then the forensic people found blood, and suddenly there were detectives and people asking questions and they kept asking me if we'd had a fight, and I told them no...but I think they thought I'd hurt him. I could never hurt him!...I loved him. I _love_ him!! He was... _is_...my life!" 

Frank fell silent, hanging his head.

"So what happened?" 

Hayley pushed, gently. Frank looked up.

"They worked out that he'd likely been kidnapped, but there was never any contact made, and there was never a ransom demand. He was just...gone."

"Until now?"

Frank smiled.

"Yes, until now. The detective who dealt with the case rocked up on my doorstep a few hours ago, and told me Gee's been found. He's in Afton, in the hospital. He doesn't remember anything though...it's like, total amnesia, or something..." 

He grinned, wide.

"But he's alive, and I'm going to get him back. No matter how long it takes."

"Well..." 

Hayley smiled as an announcement came over the tannoy telling the passengers that they would be landing shortly, and everyone should put on their seat belts, and do all that other stuff you have to do.

"I wish you all the luck in the world...and I hope his memory comes back real soon."

"Thanks. Me too."

As the plane touched down a few minutes later, Frank felt that familiar feeling in the pit of his stomach, but he pushed it away and got ready to debark. No time to get sick now.

As Frank stepped off the plane, a cold wind whipped around him. He shivered. He'd known it would be cold here, but this was something else! Wrapping his hoodie tighter around his body, Frank followed the crowd into the terminal.  
He went through all the usual rigmarole...passport check, customs etc...then headed outside to the taxi rank, his bag over his left shoulder.  
The taxi driver was a tall Lebanese guy, with black curly hair and a goaty beard. His taxi driver's I.D said his name was S. Talasikioma, though Frank couldn't work out how that was pronounced, and didn't care to ask.  
The ride to the Star Valley Medical Center only took about ten minutes, then Frank paid and thanked what's-his-name, and headed inside.

Behind the desk was a small, dark haired nurse. She looked up as Frank approached reception, and smiled softly.

"Good morning. How can I help you?"

"Hi..." 

Frank murmured.

"I'm here to visit Gerard Way?...I was told that he's here."

The nurse's eyebrows raised.

"Are you the fiancé?...from New Jersey?"

Frank nodded.

"Err, yeah. I'm Frank."

The nurse grinned and picked up a desktop microphone, apparently connected to the hospital's P.A system.

"Dr. Write to reception. That's Dr. Write to reception...thank you..." 

She smiled at Frank.

"He shouldn't be too long..." 

Then she looked past Frank to the two men sat on plastic chairs against the wall, that Frank hadn't noticed until then.

"Detectives?..." 

The men stood up and headed over to the desk.

"Detectives, this is Gerard Way's fiancé."

"Hello there..." 

One of the men stuck his hand out toward Frank, who took it and shook.

"I'm Sergeant Butch Mathews, and this is my Deputy, Paul Adler."

Frank smiled tiredly.

"You're handling Gee's case?"

"Gee?" 

The Deputy queried. Frank blushed slightly.

"Yeah sorry...Gerard."

The detectives both grinned.

"Yes, yes we are..." 

Butch confirmed.

"And we'd like to ask you a few questions before the doctor gets here. If that would be ok?"

Frank nodded.

"Sure."

Butch indicated the plastic chairs, and they all went to sit down.

"So..." 

He began.

"Gerard obviously can't tell us anything, so can you? For instance...do either of you have any connection to anyone who lives anywhere near here?"

Frank thought for a minute.

"Well, no one I can think of that lives in Wyoming. Closest I know of would be Pete. He grew up in Illinois."

"Hmm..." 

Butch hummed.

"That's too far away."

Frank frowned.

"What do you mean?...Pete didn't do this."

Butch shook his head.

"Not saying he did. We're just trying to find a connection right now cause about 90% of kidnap cases involve someone known by the victim. We're grasping at straws right now though cause there's not much else to go on."

Frank nodded in understanding.

"Ok. But look, I can't think of anyone that we know who is even _capable_ of doing something like this. And why would they? Everyone loved... _loves_...Gee! No one I know would want to hurt him...ever."

"I'm sure you're right..." 

Butch said, softly.

"We just need to cover all the bases. Hope you understand?"

Frank nodded and they sat in silence for a few minutes, as they waited for the doctor to arrive.  
When the doctor walked into reception, the nurse pointed toward Frank, causing the doctor to look over and nod. He spoke briefly to her, though Frank couldn't hear what was said, then crossed the room to Frank and the Detectives.

"Mr. Iero?..." 

Frank nodded, standing and accepting an offered hand.

"I'm Dr. Write. I've been caring for Mr. Way since he arrived."

"Can I see him?" 

Frank said, desperately. The doctor smiled sympathetically.

"Soon. But I think you should know his condition first. Take a seat please."

Frank sat down nervously, glancing at Butch.

"We'll be back later..." 

The sergeant said, standing to leave.

"We have work to do." 

Frank nodded and watched them walk away.

"Mr. Iero?..." 

Frank jumped slightly, like he'd been shocked out of a trance. He turned back to the doctor, sheepishly. The doctor smiled softly.

"So...Mr. Way's condition..." 

Frank nodded for him to continue.

"He came to us with a lot of bruising, some current and previously broken bones...mainly his ribs. Upon further examination, it was determined that he had been...sexually assaulted as well..." 

The doctor paused, seeing tears slide down Frank's cheeks.

"But he doesn't remember any of it. We don't know exactly why, but he seems to have a form of Hysterical Retrograde Amnesia..." 

At the confused look that settled on Frank's face, Dr. Write carried on.

"Retrograde amnesia is where someone is unable to recall events that occurred before the development of the amnesia, even though they may be able to encode and memorise new things that occur after the onset...and I say this is Hysterical amnesia, because it doesn't seem to be directly linked to a physical brain injury, and is more likely caused by the emotional trauma of whatever he has been through."

Frank wiped his eyes with the sleeve of his hoodie.

"So, will he know me?...and will his memory come back?"

The doctor frowned slightly.

"I'm afraid that it is unlikely that he will remember you at this time, as he didn't even remember his own name. But I think that, given time and the correct stimulus, he should regain at least most of his memories."

Frank nodded.

"So, can I see him now?"

Dr. Write nodded.

"Sure, follow me..." 

They stood up and headed through a door to the left of reception.

"Just take it slow with him, ok?..." 

Frank nodded.

"He's quite jittery, which is understandable in the circumstances, and I'm sure you don't want to scare him."

"No, I don't."

The doctor pushed though another door that had the words 'Private Room 1' next to it on the wall. Frank followed him inside. The room was dimly lit, and the blinds on the window were closed.

"He doesn't like bright lights..." 

The doctor murmured to Frank, answering his unasked question. Frank nodded. There was a privacy curtain pulled partially around the bed, and as they stepped to the foot of the bed and Frank got his first look in 5 years at the man he loved, he couldn't help the ragged sob that escaped his chest.  
Gerard was so thin and pale. His hair was a faded mess that reached to just below his shoulders, and the bandages and bruises spoke of a fraction of what he must have been through.  
The doctor stepped up to the side of Gerard's bed, and placed a light hand on his arm.

"Gerard?..." 

Gerard's eyes snapped open and a tiny, fearful squeak escaped his lips as he jolted away from the hand.

"It's ok. It's just me..." 

Then he glanced at Frank.

"...and a visitor."

Gerard calmed down a little, and looked over at Frank. The blank look he gave, confirming that he had no idea who Frank was, broke Frank's heart.

"G-Gee?..." 

Gerard frowned slightly.

"You don't re-remember...me?..." 

Gerard shook his head, his fingers gripping onto his bedsheets.

"It's me!...Frank!"

"I...I'm sorry..." 

Gee's voice sounded so small and frightened. He glanced at the doctor, who smiled reassuringly.

"H-how do y-you know me?"

Frank tentatively moved to the side of the bed. He wanted to just take Gerard in his arms and kiss him til he remembered, but he knew that would probably just scare him. Instead, he slowly reached for Gerard's pale hand. Gerard flinched slightly, but then relaxed as Frank's fingers wrapped around his own.

"We've known each other since I was 15, and you were 11. We met in middle school..." 

Frank chuckled slightly at the memory.

"You'd been skipped forward a year, so you were in 7th grade, and I was having to repeat a year cause I'd been sick a lot, so I was in 8th. We became best friends straight away. We just clicked."

"So..." 

Gerard whispered.

"You're my f-friend?”

Frank smiled.

"Much more than that..." 

He grinned at the confused look on the younger man's face.

"I'm your fiancé. We were planning to get married."

Gerard's eyes widened, almost comically.

"We?...Oh, wow!" 

He really didn't know what else to say.

"Well..." 

The doctor said.

"I guess I'll leave you two to get to know each other again."

And then he was gone, leaving Frank and Gerard to sit in a slightly tense silence. This could take some time.

"So..." 

Gerard said quietly as Frank sat himself down on a chair next to the bed, still holding the younger man's hand in his. Frank smiled gently at him to continue. 

"We're...err..." 

He waved his free hand around a bit, as he tried to think what to say. Frank laughed lightly, a fond smile on his face.

"What?" 

Gerard asked.

"You always did that..." 

Frank replied. At the confused look in Gerard's eyes, he elaborated.

"Wave your hands when you talk...I'd forgotten."

Gerard frowned slightly.

"Me too..." 

He muttered, gaining a small chuckle from Frank. They sat in silence for a moment.

"You said we're...e-engaged?"

"Yeah..." 

Frank nodded, a bright smile on his face.

"I proposed to you right after you graduated high school. I was so happy you said yes, that I stripped off and streaked the football field..." 

Frank laughed, and Gerard's eyes widened slightly.

"If I still went to the school, I think I would've been expelled." 

He grinned. Gerard smiled politely.

"Did you g-get in trouble?"

"Nah..." 

Frank shook his head.

"Security couldn't catch me..." 

He laughed at the memory.

"I had to hide in a dumpster for half an hour before you found me with my clothes though."

Gerard giggled.

"Really?"

"Yep...it was fucking disgusting, cold too..." 

Frank shook his head, smirking slightly.

"It was a good thing that you found me, and not the cops."

Gerard rolled his eyes, but a smile stayed on his lips.

"So d-do you regularly r-run around naked?"

Frank wiggled his eyebrows.

"Only for you babe..." 

He winked. Gerard dropped his eyes down, looking a little uncomfortable.

"Sorry..." 

Frank murmured.

"Too much, too soon?"

Gerard looked up, hiding slightly in his hair.

"A b-bit..." 

Frank swallowed, looking down. Silence fell over them again. After a while, Gerard spoke quietly.

"Could you..." 

He hesitated and Frank looked up, expectantly. Gerard cleared his throat before continuing.

"Could you t-tell me about m-my family...please?"

Frank smiled.

"Uh...sure..." 

He thought for a second.

"Ok, so you have a brother, Mikey. He's two years younger than you, and he has a boyfriend called Pete. I called them, but they're on vacation right now, and I had to leave a message. I'm sure they'll be on the first flight back as soon as they know you've been found though..." 

He bit his lip.

"Um..."

"What about my parents? Are...are they coming?"

Frank dropped his eyes, a frown settling on his face.

"Err...no."

After a few seconds, when Gerard realised that Frank wasn't going to explain...

"How c-come?"

Frank sighed, his shoulders slumping slightly.

"They err..." 

He looked back up, and saw inquisitive eyes staring back at him...such beautiful eyes. He sighed again.

"They don't approve...of us..." 

He tried to gauge Gerard's reaction, but he couldn't work it out.

"They...*sigh*...they disowned you when you came out...I'm sorry." 

Frank looked back down at their hands, taking a small amount of comfort in the fact that Gerard hadn't taken his hand back yet.

"Don't be..." 

Gerard murmured, giving Frank's hand a light squeeze. Surprising the older man.

"I think...I think if they c-couldn't accept me for who I a-am, then I'm probably better off w-without them..." 

He offered Frank a half smile as he looked back up.

"And I had y-you, right?..." 

Frank nodded, his smile starting to spread again.

"And my brother?..." 

Again, Frank nodded.

"Did they disown him t-too?"

Frank shook his head.

"No. Actually, he disowned them..." 

Frank smiled, wryly.

"He said that if they were gonna be bigoted bastards...his words, not mine...then they could fuck off, cause he wanted cock too."

Gerard laughed.

"He really s-said that?"

"Uh-huh..." 

Frank grinned.

"That and a lot of curse words that your folks didn't even realise he knew. It was priceless!"

"You were there?"

Frank nodded.

"Yeah. When you went to come out to them, I went with you. We all thought they'd react differently to what they did."

Gerard looked down.

"Have I seen them s-since?"

"No..." 

Frank gently stroked the back of Gerard's knuckles.

"They moved across the country a couple years later. They didn't leave a forwarding address. I'm sorry."

"Please?..." 

Gerard asked.

"Stop ap-pologising for s-something they did. It wasn't y-you."

"I know...and you've always told me not to blame myself. But I can't help feeling at least partially responsible. After all, I was the one who persuaded you to come out to them."

"It doesn't matter now..." 

Gerard murmured.

"There's n-no point in placing blame. I think I have b-bigger problems to worry about...don't you?"

Frank sighed.

"Yeah...I guess so."

Gerard saw the sadness in Frank's eyes. There was something almost familiar about the older man.

"Tell me about our life? W-where do we live?...do we have any p-pets?...that sort of thing."

Frank appreciated the change of topic.

"Well...we live in New Jersey, we always have. We had a nice little apartment..."

"Had?"

"Yeah..." 

Frank frowned.

"I kinda went off the rails when you disappeared. I drank a lot, and ended up losing the place..." 

He looked down at their hands again, embarrassed.

"But I guess that was the kick up the ass I needed, cause I straightened myself out and got busy. I got a job, and then spent every spare hour searching for you."

"Oh..." 

Gerard seemed a little taken aback by this.

"Wow!"

"You were my life Gee...you always had been."

Gerard blushed slightly, but Frank didn't know if it was from the sentiment, or the nickname. They fell quiet again, but it wasn't an awkward silence. Gerard was the first to break it.

"So d-did we have any pets?"

Frank laughed.

"We had a goldfish! You won it for me at the state fair. We spent $30 on the bowl, food, stones for the bottom, and even a little castle...Damn thing died two days later.”

Gerard chuckled.

"We didn't replace it?"

"Nah..." 

Frank shook his head.

"I wanted a dog more anyway.”

Gerard smiled.

"Did we g-get one?"

Frank's head dropped.

"No..." 

His voice went quiet and sad.

"We were gonna go get one, but you were taken three days before we were due to go. I could never face doing it alone."

Gerard frowned.

"I'm sorry."

"What the fuck are _you_ sorry for?...you didn't ask to be kidnapped!"

"True..." 

Gerard breathed.

"But it s-sounds like y-your life turned bad when I w-was."

"Still not your fault."

Silence fell once more, this time, interrupted by a nurse in a dark blue uniform entering the room.

"I'm sorry to disturb you boys..." 

She said, brightly.

"But visiting hours are nearly over."

Gerard suddenly looked terrified, his hands both gripping tight onto Frank's.

"Please c-can he s-stay?...P-please?" 

He begged, urgently. The nurse sighed.

"Well...I guess I could arrange something..." 

She saw the hopeful looks in both men's eyes.

"I'll be right back."

The nurse disappeared back out the door, and returned several minutes later with two orderlies, each holding an end of a sofa that they had appropriated from the nurses' lounge. She directed them to sit it against the wall, then went to fetch blankets and a pillow.  
When she returned and made up the couch, Frank thanked her, then she left.  
They hadn't realised what the time was, but looking now they saw that it was nearly 10pm.

"Perhaps we should try to sleep..." 

Frank suggested, seeing Gerard yawn.

"We can talk more tomorrow."

Gerard nodded his agreement, and snuggled down as much as he could in the narrow hospital bed.

"Frank?"

"Yes Gee?"

"You..." 

Gerard swallowed heavily.

"You'll b-be here in the m-morning...right?"

"Of course I will..." 

Frank moved from his sofa, where he'd kicked off his shoes and removed his hoodie, to Gerard's bedside, carefully taking the younger man's shaky hand in his again.

"I'll be here till you're well enough for me to take you home...or until you tell me to leave..." 

He leant in, hesitantly, and pressed a tiny kiss to Gerard's faded hair.

"You don't have to be afraid any more. I'm not gonna let anyone hurt you again...I promise."

Gerard barely knew this man before him, but something inside him was just screaming that he could trust him...so Gerard listened.

"Thank you..." 

He said, softly.

"Good n-night Frank."

"G'night Gee. Sweet dreams."

They both settled down to sleep, though Gerard still felt nervous and jittery. Frank made sure to stay awake until Gerard was softly snoring, then he too let himself drift off to sleep.

 

_~(Time skip~About two hours later)~_

Frank was awoken by the sounds of screaming, and it only took him a moment to discover that the frightened screams were coming from Gerard. Frank shot up off the sofa he was sleeping on and rushed to his side.

"Shh, it's ok, it's ok Gee...you're safe!...I'm here!..."

Gerard threw himself against Frank's chest, clinging on and shaking like a leaf. So what if he'd only known him a day, kind of...Frank made him feel safe, like nothing could ever hurt him. Frank was taken aback, but quickly recovered and wrapped his arms around Gerard's frail body, gently stroking his back and holding him close.

"I got you baby...I got you."

The door flew open and a panicked looking nurse rushed in. As the door slammed against the wall, Gerard screamed and dug himself harder into Frank's arms.

"What happened?" 

The nurse hurried to the bedside.

"Nightmare..." 

Frank said softly, trying not to frighten Gerard any more.

"It's ok..." 

His words more for Gerard than the nurse. The nurse sighed in relief, smiling sympathetically at Gerard before turning and leaving the room.

"Gee?..." 

Gerard sobbed into Frank's shirt. Frank could feel it was wet.

"Baby, come on...it's ok now."

Gerard slowly lifted his head, his eyes puffy and red.

"Fr-Frank?"

"I'm here baby." 

Frank cooed, stroking Gerard's hair from his face.

"Don't l-leave me?"

"Never."

Gerard asked Frank to hold him til he was asleep. Frank climbed onto the bed next to the frightened man and held him close. He stayed there all night and Gerard slept soundly.

*  
*  
*

Over the next couple days, Gerard became gradually more relaxed. Frank never left his side and spent much of the time holding his hand, and telling him about things they'd done together, how they'd met, and places they'd travelled.  
Gerard liked hearing the stories, and some of them even felt vaguely familiar...though it was more like he'd heard them before, and not that he'd lived them.  
At night, Frank always started off on the sofa...but by midnight, he was always curled around Gerard on the bed, holding him and humming to him til he fell back to sleep.

On the fourth day, Mikey called Frank's cell. On the fifth day...he arrived.

"Oh my God! I can't believe it! You're alive!..." 

He babbled as he charged straight toward the bed.

"We thought Frank was joking when we heard the message."

Gerard squeaked in distress and tried to back away from the stranger who was suddenly reaching out to hug him. He would've fallen off the bed, had Frank not been there to catch him.

"Easy baby..." 

Frank cooed, pulling him gently into his arms.

"It's ok. That's your brother."

"Wait..." 

Mikey said, incredulously.

"You weren't kidding about the amnesia either?" 

He looked shocked.

"No." 

Frank said, simply.

"Then..." 

Mikey looked confused.

"Then how come he knows you?"

Frank stroked his hand through Gerard's long hair, soothing him as he trembled against his chest.

"Because I've been here for five days..." 

Frank stated.

"You haven't."

Mikey huffed.

"We only got your message yesterday."

Frank rolled his eyes.

"Well, you're here now..." 

He looked down at the slight man in his arms.

"Gee? You can come out now. It's ok."

Gerard raised his head just enough to meet Frank's eyes.

"I d-don't know him."

"I know baby. But you trust me, right?..." 

Gerard nodded.

"And well, I know him, and when you get your memory back, you will too. He won't hurt you. He's your little brother, Mikey."

Gerard turned his head slightly to look at the gangly young man with the glasses and beanie hat. Mikey smiled at him, hopefully.

"Hi bro."

Gerard gasped and buried himself into Frank's chest again. He didn't trust the stranger, even if he was his brother. Mikey frowned, and looked daggers at Frank. Frank shrugged slightly, shaking his head. He didn't get it either.

"Gee?...what's wrong baby?" 

He tried to coax Gerard from his hiding spot.

"Don't l-like him. Make him g-go away." 

Gerard sobbed slightly, keeping his face buried so his voice came out muffled. Mikey scowled.

"What've you said to him?" 

He spat at Frank. Frank shook his head.

"Nothing Mikes, honest. Nothing bad. I just told him how close you two were, and some stories about when you were younger..." 

He looked down at Gerard.

"Baby, please?"

Gerard refused to come out as long as Mikey was there, and eventually, with the boy in his arms becoming more and more distressed, Frank suggested that Mikey go check into a hotel, and try again tomorrow. Reluctantly, Mikey agreed and left the hospital, promising to return the next day.  
Frank gently rocked Gerard in his arms, cooing softly to him. He'd climbed up onto the bed now, and Gerard was starting to calm down.

"Gee?..." 

Gerard lifted watery eyes to meet Frank's.

"Baby, why didn't you like him?"

Gerard sniffed.

"I...I d-don't know. I just...didn't."

Frank frowned slightly, then leaned in and placed a soft kiss to Gerard's forehead.

"Don't worry. You're safe, you know that, right?"

Gerard nodded.

"I feel s-safe...with you."

Frank sighed as Gerard rested his head against his chest, curling up in his arms and starting to relax again. Whatever had bothered Gerard, probably wouldn't be going away any time soon. Frank could see a lot of tears before this was resolved.  
That night, Gerard asked Frank to hold him right from the start. Frank never slept on that sofa again.

*  
*  
*

A week later, many of Gerard's injuries were healing nicely, though others had further to go. Some of his bandages had been removed, and he wasn't in as much pain as before. He was eating, though his stomach could only handle small amounts of soft, bland food, and he was getting a little bored of porridge and eggs.  
Mikey came to the hospital every day, but Gerard still couldn't even look at him without shaking in fear, yet he had no idea why.  
The two policemen had been in several times too, asking questions that Gerard was frustrated to say, he couldn't answer...but they kept coming.

"And you still don't remember anything? Not a face, a voice...nothing?..." 

Butch asked as he sat in front of the despondent younger man. Gerard shook his head, sadly.

"Well...you have my number, so if anything comes to mind, just give me a call. Ok?"

"We will..." 

Frank assured, standing from his chair and shaking the detective's hand.

"And please let us know if you find anything?"

"Of course..." 

Butch nodded, then turned toward Gerard.

"Feel better Gerard." 

He smiled. Gerard nodded, then both detectives tipped their hats, and left. Frank climbed back onto Gerard's bed, and pulled the slightly trembling man into his arms.

"It's gonna be ok baby, you'll see."

Gerard sniffed a little, then relaxed into Frank's chest.

"What if I n-never rem-ember?..." 

He stuttered, quietly.

"What if it n-never comes back?" 

He looked up at Frank with big, scared eyes. Frank kissed his forehead softly.

"You don't have to worry about that..." 

Frank shook his head.

"You will remember, I'm sure of it...just don't try to rush it. You obviously went through something bad, and this is your mind's way of protecting you, and giving you time to heal."

"I...I guess..." 

Gerard murmured.

"But I just h-hate n-not knowing."

"I know you do, but you're safe now, that's all that matters..." 

Frank gently squeezed Gerard to him, wary of his damaged ribs, and the bruising and cuts on his back.

"And maybe when the doctor says you can go home...I don't know, like...a familiar place might help with your memory."

Gerard nodded.

"Yeah...I guess." 

He rested his head against Frank's shoulder. He felt comfortable with Frank, like a part of him still knew the older man, and was telling the rest of him to trust him. He couldn't explain it, just that he felt safe.  
Mikey had been in that morning, always trying to get close to Gerard, and always being rebuffed. He looked like he was trying not to take it personally, but Gerard saw an occasional flash of anger darkening his usual poker face, and it scared him in ways he still didn't understand.  
Frank had said that Mikey would never hurt him, that he loved him and had been devastated when Gerard was taken, and Gerard tried to relax around him, but simply found that he couldn't.  
Gerard didn't know where Mikey had gone now, he'd left just before the detectives arrived, but he knew he'd be back, and that set a pit in his stomach that wouldn't go away.

Gerard was curled up in Frank's warm arms, just thinking and enjoying the comfort, and Frank's soft voice as he hummed a quiet tune to him, when the door opened and Dr. Write walked in, with a big smile on his face.

"Hello Gerard, how are you feeling today?..." 

Gerard shrugged slightly. He wasn't sure how to answer that.

"Well..." 

The doctor smiled.

"I have some good news for you."

"What is it?" 

Frank asked, hoping to get the answer they were longing for. Dr. Write smiled wide.

"Gerard, you can go home..." 

Frank grinned like a madman, while Gerard remained silent, and only nodded nervously.

"Of course, you'll need to see a doctor once you're back in Belleville..." 

He pulled a piece of paper from his clipboard and handed it to Frank.

"These are the details of a doctor at Clara Maass Medical Centre. I've forwarded your notes to her, and she's expecting your call when you get home."

"Thank you doc..." 

Frank said, looking at the paper, then smiling at the doctor.

"So I can take him home?"

"Yes, that's right. But there's no rush. Get your travel arrangements sorted, and if you have to stay here tonight, that's ok."

"Thanks..." 

Frank smiled again, then the doctor nodded and left the room. Frank turned to Gerard.

"That's good news, right?..." 

Gerard shrugged, looking down.

"Baby, what's wrong?"

Gerard slowly met Frank's eyes.

"I can go h-home?..." 

Frank nodded, happily.

"But I don't _know_ my h-home." 

He whimpered slightly, his eyes dropping again.

"Aww baby..." 

Frank kissed the top of Gerard's head.

"I know, but you will. And when we get there, I'm sure the town we grew up in will trigger your memories."

"You think so?..." 

Gerard asked, hopefully. Frank nodded.

"Ok then. But...but I d-don't want to f-fly."

Frank squeezed him gently.

"That's ok..." 

He pulled his cellphone from his back pocket, and logged onto his internet browser.

"We can go by bus or train..." 

He clicked onto a link for the local bus station.

"It’ll be like an adventure...Ok?"

Gerard nodded, snuggling down in Frank's arms as they searched for the best travel options that didn't include flight.  
It would take a lot longer, but Gerard just really couldn't face flying, and he didn't know why, as Frank had told him about the various vacations they'd taken over the years, before he was taken, and he'd never had a fear of flying before. Oh well...probably just another way his fucked up mind was protecting him. Whatever.  
Yawning wide, Gerard closed his eyes and trusted Frank to figure everything out...after all, what other choice did he have?


	3. 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The boys head home, but it’s not an easy ride.
> 
>  
> 
> ………………………………………………………………………

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi there chipmunks, how’s you? 
> 
> So it’s only three days since I updated this, but I decided to put another chapter up...thank you thePetetoherPatrick for being the only person to reply when I asked about doing this on twitter. <3 
> 
> Hope you enjoy.
> 
>  
> 
> ………………………………………………………………………

 

The next morning, after a broken, nightmare filled sleep, Gerard got dressed in some of Frank's clothes, as he had none of his own, and sat quietly on his bed as Frank went to freshen up.  
He was sat, staring out the window and twisting his hands in his lap, as the door to his room opened. Turning with a smile on his face, expecting it to be Frank, or even Dr. Write, Gerard shrunk back, his smile slipping away as Mikey walked toward him, a grin on his face and three coffee cups in his hands. 

"Morning Gee. Did you sleep ok?..." 

He held out a cup to his trembling brother, as Gerard shrugged slightly, and tentatively accepted the offered drink.

"You looking forward to going home?..." 

Mikey smiled softly, his eyebrows raising in question as he took a seat next to the bed. Gerard nodded slightly, taking a sip of the slightly bitter liquid.

"I'm headed back in a couple hours too..." 

He chuckled.

"Though I'm flying..." 

Gerard smiled tightly, trying not to let his hands shake as he drank his coffee.

"Where's Frank?"

Gerard looked toward the door, then back at Mikey.

"B-bathroom." 

He mumbled. Mikey nodded and drained the last of his drink, before standing to toss the paper cup into the trash. He returned to his seat just as Frank walked in the door.

"Morning Frank."

"Oh, hey!...morning Mikes..." 

Frank grinned as he stuffed his wash bag into his backpack and zipped it up.

"What time's your flight back?"

Mikey chuckled as he watched Frank climb onto Gerard's bed, and Gerard snuggle quickly into his side.

"Half past ten. Don't you wish you were flying too?"

Frank smiled wryly, hugging Gerard to him, and gratefully accepting the coffee that Mikey handed him.

"Nah. This way, I get to spend the next couple days on a train with Gee..." 

He grinned, pressing a kiss to the top of Gerard's head.

"And if it will make Gee happy, then it's worth it." 

Gerard looked up and smiled genuinely at Frank.

"A couple of days!?..." 

Mikey said, incredulously.

"I didn't know it'd take that long."

Frank laughed.

"Yeah, the train journey's actually 55 hours."

"Wow!...and I almost chose to go with you." 

Mikey grinned. Gerard shivered against Frank's side, and Frank squeezed him lightly, looking down at him.

"You ok baby? You cold?..."

Gerard shook his head, and burrowed himself deeper under Frank's arm. Frank cottoned on to what was wrong and put his cup down before wrapping both arms around Gerard's slight frame and shooting Mikey a small, apologetic smile. The look on Mikey's face told Frank that he'd understood too, and was somewhat miffed. Frank looked back at Gerard.

"Better baby?" 

Gerard nodded, and relaxed in Frank's protective arms. A few minutes later, Mikey had to leave so he could get to check-in on time.

"So I'll see you guys in a few days. I'll bring Pete round once you're settled in, ok?"

Frank nodded.

"Yeah. I'll give you a call when we get back..." 

He shook Mikey's hand.

"Have a safe flight Mikes."

Mikey grinned.

"Will do. See ya Frank..." 

He looked at his brother, who was still tucked into Frank's side.

"See you later Gee?..." 

He ducked his head to make eye contact. Gerard nodded slightly, then looked away. Mikey huffed slightly, then shook his head and grinned.

"Well. Bye guys." 

And then he was gone. Gerard sighed in relief and lifted his eyes to meet Frank's.

"W-what time we g-gotta leave?"

Frank kissed his forehead and smiled softly.

"About half an hour. I booked a cab."

Gerard nodded.

"So it's f-four and a half hours on a b-bus to Salt Lake City, then f-fifty f-five hours by train to th-the New Jersey t-tunnel, then 15 minutes by b-bus again, right?"

"Yeah..."

Frank nodded.

"...about that."

"I'm sorry." 

Gerard looked down at his hands and Frank frowned.

"What for baby?"

"Cause if I'd s-said yes to flying, we could be h-home in four hours, instead of t-two and a half d-days." 

Gerard muttered, biting back tears.

"Oh no baby, that doesn't matter..." 

Frank reassured him, squeezing him gently.

"Like I said to Mikey, as long as you're happy."

Gerard looked up.

"Thank you Frank."

"What for?"

"For s-staying with me, and putting up with my n-nightmares and panic attacks and shit..." 

Gerard smiled slightly.

"I w-wouldn't have blamed you if you'd l-left. I know what a burden I am right now." 

He dropped his eyes down. Frank lifted Gerard's chin gently with two fingers, till their eyes met, then leaned in and softly kissed his lips.

"I wouldn't be here if I didn't want to be. I love you Gee, with all my heart, and that's never gonna change..." 

He smiled.

"And you are _not_ a burden!" 

He kissed the tip of Gerard's nose, making the younger man giggle quietly.

"If...if you say so." 

Gerard smiled softly before resting his head back onto Frank's chest, sighing in content.  
Frank held him close as they waited for their cab to the bus station. He was actually kinda looking forward to the long journey home. He always had liked the train.

*  
*  
*

The taxi dropped Frank and Gerard at the bus station at 10:07am. Their bus wasn't due to leave until 10:40, so they had a bit of a wait.

"Do you want a coffee Gee?" 

Frank asked as they sat on a bench out front of the terminal. Gerard nodded.

"Yes p-please F-Frank." 

He smiled softly.

"Ok sweetie. You wanna stay here, or are you coming with me?"

"I'm coming!" 

Gerard said quickly and with a touch of panic, his fingers gripping reflexively onto Frank's sleeve.

"Ok baby..." 

Frank assured, wrapping his arm around the other's tiny waist and pulling him in close.

"It's ok, I won't leave you..." 

He stood, helping Gerard up beside him, and they headed across the street to a small Starbucks.

"What do you want?" 

He asked, seeing the awed look on Gerard's face as he stared up at the enormous menu board.

"Err..." 

Gerard hesitated.

"W-what did I u-used to p-pick?" 

He looked at Frank in mild fear of the choice. Frank chuckled, squeezing Gerard to him.

"Well, in hot weather, you used to have the Iced Caramel Macchiato...but in the winter, it was always the Skinny Peppermint Mocha..." 

He grinned at Gerard.

"But you could always try something new." 

He suggested. Gerard frowned.

"You're no h-help..." 

He muttered, only half joking. He looked back at the board and hummed as he thought. After a minute, he made his choice.

"I th-think I'll try a...a Salted Caramel H-Hot Chocolate...if that's o-ok?" 

He met Frank's eyes, nervously. Frank grinned.

"Hot chocolate?...not coffee?..." 

Gerard shrugged, looking down.

"Of course it's ok baby..." 

Frank tucked Gerard's hair behind his ear.

"You can have anything you want."

Gerard looked up coyly, a soft happy smile on his lips as Frank placed their order with the girl behind the counter. She gave them a funny look, but made their drinks without comment.  
Once they had their chosen beverages, Gerard's hot chocolate and Frank's espresso, they headed back out of the tiny shop, not really liking the somewhat hostile feel the place had, and went back to the bus station.  
It was now just after 10:30, so they went straight to the bus, that was just starting to board.

The big silver bus with the iconic greyhound design on the side was already about half full, but Frank and Gerard appeared to be the last passengers expected, as the doors were closed just moments after they found their seats.  
Frank steered Gerard toward the back of the bus, and then ushered him into the window seat on the right before sliding in next to him.

"You ok baby?..." 

He murmured, pulling Gerard into his side and cuddling him close to keep him warm on the slightly chilly bus.

"How's your drink?"

Gerard looked up over the rim of his travel cup, a smile in his eyes.

"It's good..." 

He said quietly.

"How's y-yours?"

Frank smiled.

"Perfect."

The bus rumbled to life, and Gerard's breath hitched, his eyes widening.

"F-Frank?" 

He whimpered, tucking himself in tighter under Frank's arm.

"Shh...it's ok baby. Just relax. I'm here." 

Frank held him close as the bus pulled out of the station and onto the road. Four and a half hours...this was going to be fun.

The bus journey seemed almost endless, and after the first two desperately boring hours, Gerard had fallen asleep curled up against Frank's side, and Frank had joined in a game of eye-spy with the little boy and his mother who were sat in the seats across the aisle.

"Eye-spy, with my little eye, something beginning with...N!" 

Frank watched as the little boy...who had very politely introduced himself to Frank as Caunor Greco, 7 years old, from Salt Lake City...thought hard, and scanned his eyes around the bus.

"N n n..." 

He frowned.

"Frank...there’s nothing starting with n."

Frank chuckled.

"Course there is. You've got one."

Caunor looked at his mum for help. She smiled and shook her head.

"I don't know..." 

She looked at Frank.

"Nails?" 

She guessed.

"Nope." 

Frank grinned. Caunor groaned and crossed his arms grumpily.

"Stupid game anyway." 

He huffed, giving up completely. Janet shrugged apologetically at Frank, offering him a small smile. Frank smiled back, before shifting slightly to get more comfortable.

"Was it nose?" 

A quiet whisper came from Gerard's lips, as his eyes fluttered open to look up at Frank. Frank smiled brightly, leaning down to kiss Gerard's forehead.

"Yeah, it was. You have a nice sleep baby?"

Gerard yawned and stretched, sitting up more.

"Yeah, b-but I c-can't wait to g-get off this b-bus." 

He stuttered, rubbing his ass and wincing. Frank smiled sympathetically.

"Sore bum baby?..." 

Gerard blushed and looked down, hiding in his hair. Frank chuckled and pulled Gerard back into his arms.

"Aww, don't worry baby...we've only got about 15 minutes left, I think."

Gerard looked up.

"C-can we g-get someth-thing to e-eat when we s-stop?"

Frank grinned.

"Sure sweetheart. What do you fancy?"

Gerard shrugged.

"Don't know. Just a s-sandwich or something. Nothing b-big."

"Ok. We have about an hour and a half wait for the train, so we could go find a deli if you like?"

Gerard nodded, smiling softly.

"S-sounds g-good Frankie." 

He snuggled into Frank's chest and relaxed. The bus, and being surrounded by strangers was scary and stressful for Gerard, but being close to Frank, he felt safe and protected...like nothing and no one could hurt him. Frank smiled, that was the first time Gerard called him by the pet name he used to use...maybe there was a trace of memory there after all.

When the bus finally pulled into the station, Frank grabbed his bag from the overhead, waved goodbye to Caunor and his mum, then took Gerard's hand and lead him off the bus and into the fresh, cold air. Gerard shivered and huddled into Frank's side, keeping his head down so he wouldn't meet anyone's eye.

"Come on honey..." 

Frank murmured.

"Let's go get some food."

Gerard nodded and they headed out, after asking the guy in the ticket office for directions to a good deli. The one he sent them to was in the opposite direction to the train station, but they had time.  
Jason's Deli was a small place that specialised in healthy food. The girl behind the counter told them that everything was locally produced, organic and home made, then gave them a minute to study the menu.  
Eventually, Gerard chose a Caprese Panini, which had fresh mozzarella, spinach, Roma tomatoes, and fresh basil pesto, all pressed in herb focaccia bread...while Frank picked a cup of organic vegetable soup.  
After they'd paid, they headed back into the cold, and started the walk to the train station...eating along the way.

It wasn't a long walk really, the city was quite pretty this time of year and they didn't need to rush, so they took their time, chatting as they walked.  
By the time they reached the station, they had both finished their light meals and disposed of the rubbish. Heading inside, they went up to the desk and collected the tickets that Frank had pre-booked and paid for, then headed trackside to wait.  
There was an empty bench on the platform so they sat down, Gerard snuggling against Frank for warmth, and the safe feeling he provided him.

It was just after 4:30 now, and the train was due to leave at 4:45.  
When it arrived, Frank lead Gerard onboard, showing their tickets to the inspector, who pointed them toward the private sleeping compartments...and they found their way to room number 9.  
Opening the door, Frank ushered Gerard inside, then followed him in before closing the door.

"I thought you'd prefer this than sitting with all the screaming kids and annoying idiots..." 

He grinned, seeing the wide-eyed excitement on Gerard's face.

"Besides...fifty five hour journey...it'll be good to be able to lay down to sleep..." 

He showed Gerard how the chairs pulled out to make beds.

"...see?"

Gerard smiled.

"Th-thank y-you Frank..." 

He stepped toward Frank and tiptoed slightly to kiss his cheek, his hands on Frank's shoulders for support.

"I...I'm so h-happy you're h-here w-with m-m-me. Thank you."

Frank smiled wide, his hands gently holding Gerard's tiny waist.

"You're welcome baby. I'm really fucking happy I'm here too..." 

He rubbed small circles on Gerard's hips with his thumbs as he looked into his eyes.

"Now let's get comfy. We got a long ride ahead of us."

Gerard nodded, and they settled onto one of the long sofa seats, Frank holding him close. A few minutes later, and they were on the way.

*  
*  
*

Fifty five hours! Fifty five fucking hours!...This was gonna get old real fast!

The constant clack clack clack of the train on the tracks was getting to Gerard and giving him a headache. They'd been in their little compartment for a bit over two hours now, and Gerard had already had enough.

"I kinda w-wish I'd said yes to going by p-plane now..." 

He murmured, his head rested on Frank's lap as the older man stroked his hair, comfortingly.

"We could be h-home by now."

Frank chuckled.

"You wouldn't have liked it..." 

He linked the fingers of his left hand with Gerard's right.

"Too crowded. Too noisy."

Gerard sighed.

"True. Plus, we w-wouldn't have our own r-room."

"And the food's better on here too..." 

Frank mused. Just then, Gerard's stomach growled. Frank grinned.

"You hungry baby?"

Gerard blushed, but looked up and nodded slightly.

"A bit, yeah."

Frank helped Gerard to sit up.

"Ok then..." 

He slipped his arm around Gerard's tiny waist.

"Let's go find the food carriage."

Gerard nodded and allowed Frank to guide him to his feet and out of their compartment. There was a lock on the door, so they left their things behind and made their way slowly toward the back end of the train.  
When they reached the last carriage, the smell of what promised to be good food hit them, and brought smiles to both their faces.

"Oh..." 

Gerard murmured, quietly.

"I didn't r-realise quite how hungry I was t-til I smelled that..." 

He looked at Frank and received an understanding smile in return.

"What is that, F-Frankie?"

Frank gently squeezed Gerard against him, simultaneously moving him out of another passenger's path as they were leaving the food car. Frank breathed in deep, his smile spreading.

"Smells like curry to me..." 

He kissed Gerard's cheek, lightly.

"Wanna try it?"

Gerard nodded.

"Ok, but w-what's in it?"

Frank led Gerard over to an open table and sat him down, sliding into the seat opposite, then picked up a menu and looked to see what kind of curry they had.

"Ooh!..." 

Frank exclaimed, licking his lips.

"It's a potato curry with tomatoes and onions in it..." 

He grinned, looking up.

"Sounds good to me. What do you think?"

Gerard looked at the picture Frank was showing him, and decided to give it a try. He nodded, a shy smile on his lips as a waiter approached their table.

"Good evening gentlemen..." 

The older man smiled, politely.

"Would you like to order food, or just drinks tonight?"

Frank answered for both of them, of course.

"Oh food, definitely..." 

He smiled at the waiter.

"We'd both like the potato curry with lime and cucumber raita please?"

"A wonderful choice sirs. Would you like anything to drink with that?"

Frank knew his own limits with curry, he also knew Gerard's, or at least what they used to be, so he knew that they should both be ok with this fairly mild dish, but decided to get glasses of milk...just in case.  
After he'd finished placing their orders, Frank watched the waiter nod, then walk away. Then he turned to Gerard and saw the younger man was trembling slightly, and trying to hide in his hair.

"Gee?..." 

He stood and moved to sit next to him, wrapping his arms around him and pulling Gerard gently into his chest.

"Baby what's wrong?" 

He felt Gerard cling to him and continue to shake.

"I...I d-don't know..." 

Gerard stuttered quietly into Frank's shirt.

"I f-feel like s-someone's watching m-me."

Frank looked around the carriage, but no one in particular caught his attention, and everyone seemed far more interested in their own food, that in him and Gerard.

"Baby..." 

Frank stroked his hair, soothingly.

"No one's watching you baby. Try to relax, OK? You're safe. I won't let anyone hurt you."

Gerard sniffed and continued to cling and hide.

"Are...are you s-sure?"

Frank kissed the top of Gerard's head, squeezing him softly.

"I'm sure baby. Everything's ok."

Just then, the waiter returned with a small trolley. On the trolley were two covered plates, two covered bowls, and two large glasses of milk.

"Your dinner, gentlemen."

Frank decided to stay where he was, as Gerard was still shaking against him. He watched as the waiter uncovered each dish, and placed them on the table.

"Thank you..." 

He smiled as the waiter bowed slightly, then wheeled the trolley away again. He gently lifted Gerard's chin and met his wet eyes.

"Food's here baby. Let's eat, yeah?"

Gerard nodded, picking up a napkin and wiping his eyes dry.

"O-ok."

Sniffing a little, Gerard sat himself up and looked at all the food. It smelled and looked delicious, but he was pretty sure he wasn't going to finish his meal...in fact, he was almost certain that he wouldn't manage half.

"Th-there's so much." 

He whispered in awe. Frank chuckled.

"Don't worry baby. Just eat what you can, ok?..." 

Gerard nodded, then scooped a small amount of curry, and a little of the cooling yogurt mix onto his spoon, and tentatively placed it in his mouth. He chewed thoughtfully.

"Nice?" 

Frank asked after swallowing his own, much larger bite. Gerard smiled softly up at Frank as he swallowed.

"Yeah..." 

He whispered.

"It's k-kinda spicy, but I l-like it."

Frank grinned as he scooped up more food.

"If the spice gets too much, drink some milk..." 

He suggested.

"It'll help."

Gerard nodded, then returned to his food.  
They ate in silence for a while, until Frank suddenly noticed that Gerard had stopped eating, and was breathing heavily, his body beginning to tremble.

"Gee?..." 

He put his spoon down and took Gerard's from his shaking hand, placing it back on his plate, then pulled Gerard into his arms.

"Baby?"

"Can..." 

Gerard shuddered violently against Frank's chest.

"Can we g-go back t-to th-the cabin? P-please?"

Frank held him tight.

"Of course. But why baby?"

"P-please Fr-Frank?...I...I don't l-like it h-here."

Frank could hear the tears and fear in the younger man's voice, and decided not to question him further.

"Sure baby, just give me a second to sort out the food." 

He raised his hand and waved the waiter back over.

"Is everything alright with your meals sir?" 

He asked as he reached the table. Frank nodded.

"Yes, it's delicious. But is there any chance of us being able to finish in our cabin?...My companion isn't feeling very well."

"Oh, I am sorry to hear that..." 

The waiter said, sympathetically.

"Of course that can be arranged, I will just fetch the trolley, then I'll follow you down, ok?"

Frank smiled gratefully.

"Thank you..." 

The waiter walked away. Frank looked down at Gerard's trembling form.

"Just a minute baby, we'll be back there soon."

The waiter returned with the trolley and loaded their food on, placing covers over all the dishes.

"Lead the way..." 

He said, smiling.

"...and I'll take payment when we get there, if that's alright?"

Frank nodded, sliding out of the seat and scooping Gerard up into his arms. Gerard gasped and clung on tight. Frank headed back toward their cabin with Gerard in his arms. When they got there, he handed the room key to the waiter so he didn't have to set Gerard down.  
The waiter let them in then stood back. Frank carried Gerard in and sat down with him in his lap. The waiter brought in the trolley then pulled out the bill and a credit card reader. He pointed to a call button on the wall by the door.

"When you've finished, just press this and someone will come to collect the trolley."

Frank nodded and handed over his credit card. Once the payment was done, the waiter thanked him then left them both in peace.  
Frank cradled Gerard close to his chest and rocked him gently. He didn't know what exactly had scared Gerard so badly, but whatever it was, he was not going to let it win.

"Baby?...do you want to eat any more?"

Gerard lifted his pale face from Frank's chest and nodded slightly.

"A...a little bit, please?..."

Frank grabbed the trolley and pulled it toward them, then uncovered one plate of curry, and one bowl of raita. He scooped a bit of each onto the spoon, then held it up to Gerard's still quivering lips. Gerard met Frank's eyes, incredulously.

"You're...you're gonna f-feed me?"

Frank grinned.

"Anything for you baby. Anything in the world."

Gerard smiled then opened his mouth to accept the bite. He may not remember their life from before, but if these last few days were anything to go by, then their life together from here on would be a happy one...just as long as he could get past the feeling that someone was, even now, watching him.

*  
*  
*

_Pain!...Blood!...Darkness!...Cold!.............Noise!...So loud it hurt!..._  
_Tears!...Screaming!...Shouting!...Pain!..._  
_Pain!..._  
_Pain!..._  
_PAIN!..._  
_PAIN!..._  
...  
...  
...  
_Silence...for what seems like forever!..._  
_BLINDING, RIPPING, TERRIFYING PAIN!!!_

*  
*  
*

Gerard woke screaming, frightened, thrashing against arms that fought to hold him down.

"Gee calm down. Baby please?..."

Frank tried. Gerard was too far in his terror for the other man's words to even register.

"Gee please..."

Frank held onto Gerard's arms as the terrified man lashed out blindly. His right arm got loose and struck Frank in the eye...Frank barely even flinched.

"Gee, it's me, it's Frank. You're safe baby..."

Frank continued to hold him and coo soft, gentle words.

"You're safe..."

Gerard could hear someone talking, could hear it through his fear. The voice was soft and calm...familiar. His thrashing slowed as exhaustion started to take hold, allowing him to concentrate on the voice...the words...so soothing. Gerard's eyes were still closed tight as all fight left him, and he finally went limp in the warm embrace.

"You're safe baby. That's it...come back to me."

Tears streamed down Gerard's pale cheeks as he trembled and whimpered pitifully.

"F-Fr-ankie?"

Frank sighed with relief.

"I'm here baby...I got you. You're OK."

Gerard knew he was very far from OK, but he was with Frank, and somehow that made everything a little easier to bare.

*  
*  
*

The rest of the train journey was long and exhausting and spent almost entirely inside their private room, as Gerard was too jittery and scared to be around anyone except for Frank.

Frank had arranged with the waiter for their meals to be brought to them, and every time the knock came to their door, Gerard would curl in on himself and refuse to look up until they were alone again.

But finally they had gotten off of the train, spent another thirty five minutes on a bus from the New Jersey tunnel to Teterboro airport, where Gerard panicked until Frank explained that they were just there to collect his car, and fifteen minutes in the car to Frank's house...but now they were home, except...Gerard had never been in this house, so there was nothing that could help with his memories.

"I know it's not much..."

Frank said as he showed Gerard around the ground floor.

"But it's ours."

Gerard turned his head from where he was looking at a photo of the two of them taken somewhere hot and bright...he didn't remember where of course.

"Ours?"

Frank stepped closer, carefully taking Gerard's hand.

"Yeah...I mean...when I bought and furnished this place, I had you in mind. I always pictured how you would react. I could almost see you shaking your head and rolling your eyes when I bought that clock."

He pointed behind Gerard. Gerard turned and eyed the clock curiously, then turned back and rolled his eyes.

"That's r-ridiculous."

He said of the Garfield clock. Frank laughed.

"I was right."

Gerard laughed lightly.

"Where was th-this taken?"

He pointed to the photograph...they looked really young. Frank smiled.

"That was just after you graduated...just after we got engaged. I took you to Vagas to visit a college buddy of mine..."

Frank chuckled.

"The guy was a total stoner in college, but he's a kick ass shrink now..."

He tilted his head slightly.

"Would you consider talking to him?...I mean...I know you don't remember anything, but he could help with your nerves."

Gerard frowned slightly.

"I-in Vagas?"

"Oh no no. No, he lives and works in Newark now."

Gerard chewed on his lip.

"Well...I g-guess it couldn't h-hurt."

"Cool. I'll give him a call tomorrow if you like?...see if he can see you this week."

Gerard nodded with a small smile. He moved back to examining what was now his home. After a while of Frank following him round, answering all the questions he had...Gerard's stomach rumbled softly. Frank chuckled as Gerard blushed pink.

"You hungry?...you want me to order pizza?"

Gerard nodded, trailing Frank to the kitchen where he opened a drawer revealing about a hundred take out menus. Gerard raised an eyebrow and glanced around the kitchen.

"C-can you c-cook?"

He asked, unsurely.

"Can I?...yes. Do I?..."

Frank smirked.

"Probably not as often as I should..."

He grabbed a pizza menu and pulled his cell out of his jeans pocket.

"You used to like the Quattro formaggi...you want that?"

Gerard tilted his head.

"I can't even pr-pronounce that. W-what's in i-it?"

Frank chucked.

"It means four cheeses."

Gerard smiled, licking his bottom lip before trapping it between his teeth and nodding enthusiastically. Frank swallowed hard...he really shouldn't be having the thoughts he was having right now, just caused by the younger man's tiny, innocent action. Frank had to remind himself that Gerard may be/have been (he still wasn't sure which) his fiancé...but he didn't remember that, and despite everything they'd done together in the past, and everything Gerard had been through these last five years...he was basically an innocent boy again. Frank had to keep himself in check.

Frank lead the way back into the living room and pointed to the shelves upon shelves of DVDs.

"Why don't you pick something to watch while I order our food baby...sorry..."

He corrected, seeing Gerard look down at the pet name.

"Force of habit. I'll try to stop doing that if it makes you uncomfortable?"

Gerard shook his head and looked up with red cheeks.

"I...I like it."

Frank grinned then shooed Gerard toward the DVDs before dialling the number and placing the order.  
After a conversation that took about five minutes longer than it should because the girl on the other end of the line was apparently a moron who probably didn't even know what cheese was...Frank hung up and turned to see Gerard sat crosslegged on the couch holding his chosen DVD case in his hands. Frank raised an eyebrow.

"Finding Nemo?...really?..."

Gerard looked at the case for a moment then looked back up with a grin and a nod.

"Ok then."

Frank took the case and put in the DVD before sitting down next to Gerard. He kind of expected Gerard to lean against him as he started the movie...he didn't expect him to climb into his lap and let out a content little sigh.

"Comfy baby?"

Gerard nodded and Frank wrapped an arm around him as the opening scene began.  
About half an hour into the movie, the doorbell rang and Gerard squeaked fearfully, burying himself into Frank's shirt.

"It's just the food baby...I gotta get up."

Gerard reluctantly crawled off of Frank and pulled a throw cushion to his chest for comfort. Frank got up, grabbed his wallet from the pocket of his jacket that was hanging on the bannister at the bottom of the stairs, and went to answer the door.

The rest of the evening was pizza, Nemo (twice), and The Lion King, which had to be turned off cause Gerard didn't like when Mufasa died.  
At a little after 10, Gerard was yawning into Frank's neck, as he had migrated back into Frank's lap when they'd finished eating.

"You tired baby?...wanna go to bed?"

Gerard yawned again and nodded sleepily. Frank smiled, turned off the TV, and scooped him up into his arms. Gerard clung on tight, nuzzling into Frank's chest as the older man carried him up the stairs to their room.

"You sure you're ok with this?..."

Frank indicated the large double bed.

"I could sleep on the floor if you'd be more comfortable?"

Gerard shook his head, holding in another yawn.

"W-want you to h-hold me...like b-before."

Frank wasn't sure if Gerard meant when he was in the hospital, and then on the train...or if he meant before he was taken. Either way, Frank wasn't going to say no.

"Ok baby..."

He set Gerard down on the edge of the bed and crossed to the dresser. He pulled out two pairs of pyjama pants and returned to the quiet boy's side. He handed over a pair with Batman logos all over them.

"You change in here, I'll go in the bathroom...ok?"

Gerard nodded and Frank turned and headed off to change. When he returned after a few minutes, he found Gerard snuggled under the covers waiting for him. He smiled and slid in next to him. Gerard cuddled into his side and sighed happily.

"Goodnight baby."

Frank cooed as he pressed a soft kiss to Gerard's forehead then clicked off the bedside lamp.

*  
*  
*

It was nearly midnight according to the little red numbers on the clock next to the bed, and Gerard was still awake. He couldn't sleep in a new place it seemed, and it was annoying him. With a small huff, he wriggled out of Frank's arms and out of the bed, then tiptoed out of the room and downstairs...maybe a drink of milk would help him to sleep.

Gerard shuffled into the kitchen. He didn't bother with the light, and just walked over to the drainer where his glass from earlier was now dry.  
His hand was on the glass when some sense or other made him look up at the window over the sink. He gasped in fright as he saw someone stood out there in the back yard, staring right back at him.

Shaking with fear, Gerard backed out of the kitchen then turned and ran fast back up the stairs and into the bedroom. He practically threw himself back into the bed and buried himself against a somehow still sleeping Frank, pulling the covers up over his head and trying really hard to make himself believe that that hadn't just happened.

He didn't fall asleep until the sun was starting to rise.


	4. 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Trying to get back to normal isn’t so easy when things keep coming back to haunt you.
> 
>  
> 
> …………………………………………………………………………

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi there chipmunks, how’s you? 
> 
> So here’s another chapter for you, but don’t worry...it’s definitely not the last ;)  
> Xxx
> 
>  
> 
> …………………………………………………………………………

 

Frank woke at about ten to find that Gerard was actually asleep. It was good...maybe he hadn't had any nightmares, and Frank hadn't been woken if he had. Smiling softly at the beautiful boy laying beside him, Frank slipped out of the bed, grabbed his phone and quietly left the room. He went downstairs and started some coffee. While the coffeemaker did its thing, he dialled his friend's office number. After two rings the call was answered.

"Good morning, Dr. Urie's office. How can I help you?"

"Hi Emily, it's Frank. Can you put me through to Brendon please?"

"Oh hi Frank..."

The girl chirped, dropping her formal telephone voice for her more relaxed Jersey accent.

"Sure, I'll put you right through."

There was a click and a buzz, then Frank heard his friend's voice down the line.

"Hey Frankster...what's up man?"

Frank grinned down the line...he hadn't talked to Brendon in a while, but it was just like always...easy.

"Hi Bren, you good? Look...I kinda need a serious conversation with Dr Urie right now...ok?"

"Sure..."

Brendon said...Frank could hear the other man moving into a more professional position.

"How can I help?"

Frank took a breath.

"Gerard's back...and we need your help."

He knew that Brendon would understand.

After a few minutes, Frank finished his phone call and poured himself a coffee...he sat at the little table in the kitchen and drank quietly as he thought. Inevitably, his thoughts turned to Gerard. The younger man was so timid and scared now. He'd always been shy, but there used to be a fire in his eyes, a light that Frank loved to see grow brighter when it was just them and Gerard talked animatedly about art or comics or any of the other things that he was passionate about...that light wasn't there now, not like before. The monster who had taken him, hurt him...they had taken that light. Frank was determined to find a way to reignite it, he just wasn't sure how yet.

Frank had just finished his second cup of coffee, and looked through the post...bill, bill, take-out menu to add to the collection, bill, travel brochure...when he heard light footsteps coming down the stairs. He looked out into the living room and after a moment he saw Gerard emerge.

"Morning baby, did you sleep ok?..."

Frank greeted with a smile. Gerard shrugged as he walked over, rubbing his eyes tiredly with his fist before climbing onto Frank's lap and curling up with his head on Frank's shoulder. Frank frowned slightly at the boy's quietness but brushed it off as tiredness as he wrapped his arms around Gerard's thin body.

"Do you want some breakfast baby?...I could make you pancakes if you like..."

Gerard shook his head against Frank's neck, fingers playing absently with the front of Frank's shirt. 

"You need to eat something, you know what the doctor said about getting your body used to food again..."

Again, Gerard shook his head. Frank sighed.

"What's wrong baby?...are you ok?..."

Gerard shrugged one shoulder silently.

"Talk to me baby, I can't help you if I don't know what's wrong."

"Nothing's wrong, just tired."

Gerard said quietly. Frank wasn't buying it.

"Are you sure baby?...did you have a nightmare?...did you remember something?"

Gerard shook his head before lifting his face to look at Frank.

"No, n-nothing like that..."

He gave Frank a small, weak smile.

"I'm j-just tired."

Frank sighed again, he could tell there was something else, but he didn't want to upset Gerard by pushing him to talk.

"Ok baby. Look, I was thinking maybe we could go out for a while today. Perhaps we could go to the zoo, look at the animals. You always used to love the zoo, and it should be practically empty today, no crowds or anything. A nice walk, some fresh air...I'll even buy you an ice cream if you want. What do you say?"

Gerard smiled a little wider, a little more genuinely. He nodded.

"Yeah, that s-sounds nice actually..."

He shivered slightly.

"...b-better if I could swap the i-ice cream for a h-hot chocolate though."

Frank smiled wide.

"Whatever you want baby. Why don't you go jump in the shower and I'll find you some warm clothes that'll fit."

Gerard nodded, slipping off of Frank's lap.

"Ok, but I c-can't keep borrowing your clothes all the t-time."

"No I know. I'll take you shopping soon...tomorrow maybe, if you're up for it."

"Maybe."

Gerard smiled then headed for the bathroom. Frank went to the bedroom and found Gerard a pair of jeans, a Green Day shirt and a faded Black Flag hoodie, plus underwear. He took it to the bathroom and knocked on the door. He could hear the shower running.

"Gee, I'll leave your clothes here, just outside the door. I'll be downstairs when you're ready."

"Ok Frank."

Gerard called back, sticking his head out of the curtain to answer. When he had finished his shower and got dressed, finding the clothes a little big, but manageable and comfortable, he headed downstairs to find Frank.  
Frank was sat on the sofa replying to a text when Gerard appeared. He looked up and smiled.

"Hey baby, you ok?...ready to go?"

He asked as he stood up and slipped his cell into his back pocket. Gerard nodded shyly.

"Yeah, I'm actually l-looking forward to this."

Frank smiled wide as he walked over and gently took Gerard's hand, lifting it to softly kiss his fingers. Gerard giggled, his cheeks flushing pink as he lowered his head to hide behind his hair. Frank chuckled and tucked Gerard's hair behind his ear, urging the younger man to look up.

"No hiding baby, you're too pretty to hide..."

Gee giggled again, his smile still shy, but growing.

"Ok, let's go see some animals then, yeah?"

Gerard nodded and they headed out.

*  
*  
*

When they arrived at the zoo, Frank was right, it wasn't busy at all. Gerard smiled softly as Frank held his hand and they started to walk slowly around the large space.

"So what do you want to see first baby?"

Frank asked with a warm smile and a squeeze of Gerard's hand.

"I don't know, what's c-close by?"

Frank pulled out the little folded map they'd been given at the gate.

"Um, well the giraffes are over there..."

He pointed to their left.

"And the monkeys are that way."

He pointed to the right. Gerard looked both ways then smiled wide.

"Monkeys...I think?"

What had started as a statement, had turned into a timid query. Frank squeezed his hand and smiled gently at him.

"Anything you want baby."

Gerard's smile grew and they headed off to the right, hand in hand.

*  
*  
*

The day started to grow colder shortly after two, so with hot chocolates in hand, they headed back to the car. Gerard hadn't let go of Frank's hand since they arrived and Frank took note that he was still quieter than yesterday, but he didn't push for a reason as he hoped that Gerard would tell him when he was ready.

The drive home was quiet and uneventful, and when they got inside, Gerard excused himself and disappeared to the bathroom. Frank sat on the sofa and wondered what he could do to help the younger man...what he could do to make things easier for him. He turned on the tv and quickly found a movie on Netflix for them to watch, he hoped it could take Gerard's mind off of what was bothering him. When Gerard returned from the bathroom, he sat down next to Frank and curled up into his side, unfocused eyes gazing at the tv.

"Are we w-watching a movie?"

He asked, seeing the Netflix logo on the screen.

"Yeah baby, I thought we'd watch one of your favourites..."

He pressed play.

"Batman."

"I...I don't r-remember it."

Frank grinned.

"Well you used to love it."

"Ok then."

Frank wrapped one arm around the thin boy and held him close as the movie started. 

Gerard relaxed more as the movie went on. His mind still flicked back to seeing that figure in the garden from time to time, but by the time the credits rolled, he was wide eyed with excitement at the prospect of watching one of the sequels Frank had told him about...even though he said that there was basically zero continuity from one to the next, and that if he could remember the comics, then he would almost certainly not like the other movies. Gerard didn’t remember the comics, and he didn’t care about the continuity...he just cared that they helped to take his mind off of his fears. 

About two thirds of the way through the third movie, having paused the second just ten minutes in to get food, Gerard started to yawn. Nightmares and terrors meant that he was sleep deprived at this point...though the thought of sleep, and more nightmares, wasn’t exactly appealing.

"You tired baby?"

Frank said softly as Gerard tried in vain to disguise his fourth yawn in the space of two minutes. 

"A little."

He murmured. Frank chuckled, reaching for the remote.

"Ok, time for bed then. We can watch the rest of this tomorrow if you want."

Gerard nodded sleepily and watched as Frank turned off the movie, then the tv. Frank gently scooped Gerard up into his arms, making the boy gasp quietly and cling to him, then carried him carefully up the stairs to bed.

Gerard was only woken by one nightmare that night...but it was a bad one.

*  
*  
*

_Gerard was doing laundry when the doorbell rang. He frowned slightly, he wasn’t expecting anyone today. Putting down the laundry basket, he headed to the door. He didn’t think to look through the spy hole and maybe he should’ve, but this was a safe neighbourhood and he just never felt the need. Opening the door, Gerard’s eyes widened and a scream tried to escape his lips...but too late, the person in front of him had a hand clamped over his mouth, and the person behind him... **how the fuck was there someone behind him?!**...was shoving a needle into the side of his neck. Everything went black._

*  
*  
*

Gerard woke up with a strangled scream, his hands going to his throat as terror ripped through his body. Frank was awake a half second later, clicking on the bedside light and turning to comfort the flailing, crying and hyperventilating boy in the bed next to him.

"Gee?...Gee baby, it’s ok. You’re safe. I’m here baby...I’m here..."

Gerard’s eyes were squeezed shut as he panicked under Frank's hands, gasps and wails slipping from his lips as he tried to fight off his attacker.

"Baby it’s me, it’s Frank...you’re safe baby. It was a dream. You’re safe now."

Frank’s calm voice slowly started to break through the fog of Gerard’s terror and the fight left him, his body falling limp as hot tears streamed down his cheeks to soak the pillow beneath him.

"F-F-Fran-kie?"

"Yeah baby, it’s me. Open your eyes sweetheart...it’s ok."

Frank soothed, his hands tracing slowly up and down Gerard’s arms. Gerard whimpered, sniffing back his tears before hesitantly opening his eyes. He looked up at Frank with desperation.

"I...I r-remem-ber."

Frank’s eyes widened.

"You do?...what baby, what do you remember?"

Gerard sniffed, trembling as he pressed himself into Frank’s chest, the older man instantly wrapping him up in his warm, strong arms.

"I remember the d-day I was t-taken."

Frank swallowed heavily. He wanted Gerard to remember so that the monsters who did this to him could be caught...but on the other hand, remembering would likely make Gerard even more scared than he already was.

"Did you see faces?"

He asked after a minute, when it became clear that Gerard wasn’t going to say any more. Gerard shuddered violently, then lifted his tear stained face up to look into Frank’s eyes.

"No."

Fresh tears started to fall and Frank decided not to try to push for any more tonight. Carefully, he pulled their disturbed blankets back up over them and cuddled Gerard close into his chest. He could feel the tremors running through the younger man's body as he tried to relax, and gently began to stroke his hands up and down Gerard’s spine.

"You’re safe now baby, I’m never gonna let anyone hurt you again."

He softly pressed a kiss to the top of Gerard’s head and prayed to a God he no longer believed in, to let the boy get some rest...for a while at least.

*  
*  
*

Morning came and Frank woke to find Gerard curled up asleep...with his thumb in his mouth. Frank chuckled quietly, he’d almost forgotten how cute that looked. Yawning, he slipped silently out of the bed and walked to the bathroom. He took his morning piss, went back to the bedroom to pull on a hoodie, then headed downstairs to make them some breakfast.

Clicking on the coffee machine, he turned and walked over to the fridge for eggs and cheese...Gerard always used to love his omelettes. He frowned when he saw they were out of eggs. He could make something else of course, but he had his heart set on treating Gerard to all his favourites today. 

Sighing quietly, Frank went back up to their bedroom. Gerard was still fast asleep, and after last night he deserved the rest. Frank knew he could be quick...run to the local market and back before Gerard even knew he was gone...but he hesitated. What if Gerard woke up and he wasn’t there?...he’d told him that he’d keep him safe, he didn’t want to let him down now. Sighing, he crossed to the bedside and gently touched Gerard’s shoulder.

"Gee...baby wake up."

He murmured softly. Gerard stirred, his eyes fluttering open to look up at Frank expectantly.

"F-Fwankie?"

He mumbled around his thumb before pulling it out with a wet pop. Frank smiled softly, brushing Gerard’s hair from his face.

"It’s ok baby. Look, I need to get a couple things from the store. It’s just up the road and it’ll only take ten minutes. Do you wanna get dressed and come with me, or would you be ok here on your own for a little while?...I would make sure all the doors are locked up tight. You’d be completely safe."

Gerard whimpered slightly, then swallowed and shook his head.

"I’ll...I’ll stay h-here. I g-gotta do it s-sometime...right?"

Frank cupped Gerard’s soft cheek, feeling the boy lean into his touch. He smiled fondly at him.

"Are you sure?...you could come. I don’t want you to push yourself if you’re not ready to be alone."

"No...I’ll be ok. Just...just don’t be too l-long...Ok?"

Frank chuckled.

"I won’t baby. Now, would you like me to get you anything?...chocolate maybe?"

Gerard yawned and shook his head.

"No th-thanks Frankie."

"Ok baby. Try to sleep some more and I’ll be back in a few minutes."

He pressed a soft kiss to Gerard’s forehead, then stood and quietly left the room. He went back downstairs and slipped on his sneakers, then grabbed his keys and wallet and left the house...double locking the door on his way out. He could be quick...for Gerard he would fucking run there and back.

*  
*  
*

Twelve minutes, that’s all it took. Twelve minutes and Frank was walking quickly back up the road toward the house...but when the house came into view...

"What the..."

His eyes widened as he saw someone stood in their front yard, peering in through the living room window.

"HEY!...WHAT ARE YOU DOING THERE?"

The figure turned quickly...he had a hood up over his head and Frank couldn’t see his face as he took off out of the yard and off down the road. Frank gave chase for just a few moments before stopping and turning quickly back to the house. He dug his keys out of his pocket and unlocked the front door, hurrying inside and instantly hearing frightened sobbing coming from the kitchen. He shut the door and rushed through to find Gerard curled up on the floor beneath the kitchen table. He put down the shopping and sunk to his knees, crawling in after him.

"Baby?...baby it’s ok...you’re safe baby..."

He reached out slowly but Gerard whimpered, backing away. Frank let his hand drop, his own tears threatening to fall. He lowered his head defeatedly.

"I’m so sorry baby. I shouldn’t have gone."

Gerard sniffed pitifully, his arms wrapped tight around his knees as he rocked himself back and forth. He kept his eyes locked on the man in front of him, the man he’d trusted to keep him safe. But really, why would he trust him?...he barely even _knew_ him. Gerard had come to accept that they have a past, that they were together...he’d seen too many photos of the two of them to deny it...but he still didn’t remember, and the only thing that made him trust Frank was a gut feeling. Was that really enough?  
He saw the sadness in the drop of Frank's shoulders and he found himself wanting to comfort him. In that moment he knew...no matter what they’d been before, _now_ they were together, and _yes_ , he _can_ trust Frank. Swallowing back his fears, he reached out a small, shaky hand. He hesitantly touched Frank’s shoulder and the older man looked up, tears on his face and hope in his eyes.

"Baby?"

Gerard shivered and swallowed heavily.

"It’s...I’m...I’m ok."

Frank sucked in a deep breath and let it out shakily.

"I’m really sorry."

"I kn-know. It’s n-not your f-fault..."

Gerard sniffed.

"There w-was s-someone outs-side."

"I saw. They’re gone now."

"Did you s-see who it w-was?"

Frank shook his head.

"No baby, he had a hood. I’m gonna call the cops though...no one's going to hurt you."

Gerard nodded, sniffing as he finally uncurled himself and moved closer to Frank, who tentatively wrapped his arms around the shivering boy. Gerard sighed softly, relaxing against Frank's chest.

"Do you think it was...them?"

Frank would be willing to put money on it, but he didn’t want to freak Gerard out any more.

"No baby, I seriously doubt it. It was probably just someone looking for a house to rob...don’t worry."

He pressed a kiss to the top of Gerard’s head, then carefully moved them both out from under the table. He scooped Gerard up into his arms and carried him through to the living room, then sat down on the couch with the boy in his lap and dug his cellphone out of his pocket to call the police...by the time they arrived, Gerard was asleep.

*

The officers who came took photographs and both of their statements about what they’d seen...even though Gerard could barely speak for crying, and Frank could only tell them the person's approximate height and what he was wearing, as he hadn’t seen anything of their face at all. They tried to take fingerprints too, but apparently the person was wearing gloves. 

The officers left after about an hour, and Frank was left to calm Gerard back down...he never _did_ get round to making that omelette. 

*

The rest of the day was spent curled up on the couch watching movie after movie after movie, with Gerard clinging to Frank like his life depended on it. At only a few minutes after ten o'clock that night, they headed quietly up to bed. That night...Gerard did _not_ sleep well!

*  
*  
*

_Gerard felt sick as he woke up. Something was very wrong and he couldn’t figure out what it was. He could feel pain radiating from just about every inch of his body and as he tried to curl in on himself, he discovered that he couldn’t actually move. Opening his eyes, he realised that he wasn’t at home in his lovely warm bed, with his lovely fiancé...and that in fact, from what he could tell, he was actually tied naked to a table in a dimly lit basement. Trying to turn his head, he noted that there was a strap across his forehead, holding his head in place, and on top of all that, there was something hard in his mouth to keep him quiet. He thought maybe this was all a nightmare, after all, he _had_ let Frank persuade him to watch Saw last night._

_Laying there shivering, Gerard was quick to realise that this wasn’t in fact a dream, and that he was actually in rather a lot of trouble. He tried to struggle against his binds, but it was no use, and all it did was hurt him more. Tears started to leak from his eyes as he heard footsteps approach, then there was someone leaning over him. He couldn’t see a face, only a mask and the ball pein hammer in the man's right hand. He tried to scream around his gag...tried to beg for them to let him go...but they didn’t, and the man raised the hammer high above Gerard’s chest before bringing it down with a..._

*  
*  
*

Gerard woke up screaming, his eyes wide and chest aching from the memory as he scrambled out of the covers and onto the bedroom floor, his legs giving out instantly and sending him crashing to his knees. Frank was there in a moment, frightened eyes watching him as he struggled for breath. Frank knew now not to try to hold him before he was ready, but he cooed to him and promised him that he was safe and that it was just a dream.

"But it...it was s-so _r-real_!...I was th-there...I f-felt it."

Frank didn’t know how to help, except to reassure and hold him when he would finally allow it. The nightmares were getting worse, and Frank didn’t know how much more Gerard could take.

Eventually, Gerard wore himself out crying and reliving the nightmare in his head, over and over. Eventually he let Frank hold him, and eventually he passed out in the older man's warm embrace. Frank carefully moved them both back into the bed and wrapped himself around Gerard’s thin body, holding him close and humming softly to him in the hopes that it would stave off any more nightmares for the night.

Frank didn’t sleep any more that night, and Gerard’s sleep was punctuated by flashes of nightmare memories that woke him and threatened to drive him insane. By the time morning came, they were both exhausted but neither one wanted to attempt to sleep. 

Frank shuffled himself out of bed and went to piss, then returned to the bedroom and scooped Gerard up out of the bed. He took the younger man to the bathroom, then carried him downstairs and into the kitchen.

"Coffee baby?"

He mumbled tiredly. Gerard nodded, leaning his head down on the counter as Frank turned on the machine, then went to fetch the mail. Frank walked back in with a small pile of letters...mostly bills and another take out menu...and a hand written envelope with both of their names and no address on the front.

"Huh...someone must’ve dropped it in..."

Frank sat down next to Gerard as the coffee machine was still doing it's thing, and opened the letter. Gerard sat up and rested his head onto Frank’s shoulder so he could see what was inside. As Frank tipped out the contents, Gerard really wished he hadn’t looked.

"Oh fuck!"

Frank exclaimed as he saw the dozen or so photographs of Gerard...of _his Gee_...tied up and being tortured and raped. At his side, Gerard let out a frightened gasp, then turned and threw up all over the floor. Then, he passed out...Frank was only glad that he’d been quick enough to catch him. 

*

Two hours later and Detectives had been and gone again, taking the pictures with them. They thought there might be fingerprints, but Frank wasn’t gonna put money on it. Things were going from bad to worse, and this latest incident was all the proof anyone needed that the man Frank saw at the window, had _definitely_ been involved.

A week passed in a whirlwind of nightmares, coffee and panic attacks...and then the Detectives returned.

"We have good news..."

The lead detective said with a smile. Frank raised a weary eyebrow at the man from his place on the couch, with Gerard curled up tight in his lap.

"We’ve made an arrest."

"Really?...who?"

The detective pulled out a mug shot from his pocket and handed it to Frank.

"His name is Charles Redwood. His prints were all over the pictures and he’s confessed to Gerard’s abduction, and to holding him against his will. He also listed various things that he’d done...he’s going away for a long time...it’s over."

Gerard looked up with glassy eyes.

"What about the o-other one?"

The detective smiled softly.

"Mr. Redwood said they had a disagreement. He says he killed him and was disposing of the body when you escaped. You were very lucky...this guy's quite unhinged."

Frank felt Gerard tremble and squeezed him close, cooing softly to him.

"It’s over baby. You’re safe now. It’s over."

Tears of relief slipped from both their eyes as they clung to each other...they could finally relax. The Detectives said their goodbyes and left, and Frank and Gerard finally got some sleep.


	5. 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Two months later and all is well...isn’t it?
> 
>  
> 
> …………………………………………………………………………

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi there chipmunks, how’s you? 
> 
> Well, it’s time for another chapter...I said it wasn’t over, didn’t I ;)  
> ...hope you like it.
> 
> Enjoy.
> 
>  
> 
> …………………………………………………………………………

_~(time jump~a little over two months later)~_

 

Things were really starting to settle down. Gerard was eating a little more and now had regular Thursday afternoon appointments with Dr. Urie, which were helping. The nightmares weren’t _gone_ , but they were less, and Gerard was managing to sleep easier now...as was Frank. Gerard was still nervous and didn’t like to be left alone, and his memory still hadn’t returned...but he was dealing with it.  
Another thing that was better, was that he could be in a room with his brother, and not freak out. The two couples, Frank and Gerard, and Mikey and Pete, had spent several evenings together, eating take out and watching movies...just like they used to do so very long ago. Gerard wasn’t 100% comfortable with him, or Pete...but he was getting there.

Frank had decided to take Gerard out on a date. He had it all planned...movie, ice cream then a walk in the park. It was going to be a perfect night. They _both_ hoped that it could be the night they could reignite their physical relationship, as all Gerard had been comfortable with until now, was kissing and a little light petting. They both felt it was time to try and move on.

"You look beautiful baby."

Frank said when Gerard emerged from their bedroom, all dressed up for their evening out. He had discovered a certain penchant for more feminine clothing when Frank took him shopping, though he drew the line at actually wearing a dress. Currently he was wearing a pair of low waisted girl's skinny jeans, a long sleeved, fitted Rolling Stones shirt and knee high black leather biker style boots. He also had pink lacy panties on under his jeans, but he wasn’t about to tell anyone about that...well, maybe he’d tell or _show_ Frank later...maybe. His shoulder length hair had been trimmed and Frank helped him to dye it black, so right now he was actually feeling pretty good. He smiled shyly as he walked over to the older man, who was already dressed and ready to go.

"Th-thanks. So, what m-movie are we s-seeing?"

"Well I was thinking maybe that one we saw the trailer for the other night, The Greatest Showman? What do you think?"

"That sounds g-good. I l-like that g-guy in it."

Frank raised an eyebrow.

"Really?...you _like_ him?"

Gerard giggled, rolling his eyes.

"Not like th-that. H-he’s just a g-good actor."

"Mhmm..."

Frank hummed sarcastically before grinning, wrapping his arm around the boy's thin waist and pulling him into his side.

"Come on baby, let’s go."

*  
*  
*

The theatre was quite busy and Gerard pressed himself in closer to Frank’s side as they walked in through the foyer. He was still nervous of people he didn’t know, even though his abductors were gone...he just couldn’t seem to turn off the feeling that someone was still watching him. Frank always assured him that he was safe and did everything he could to take his mind off of his fears...but it was hard sometimes.

After getting their tickets, drinks and a large tub of popcorn to share, they made their way into the large darkened room. The commercials were playing on the screen as they moved down to the third row from the back and took their seats. Gerard sat against the wall so only Frank was sat next to him.

"Comfy baby?"

Frank asked as Gerard leaned against him, relaxing in the dark. Gerard smiled, nodding happily.

"Y-yeah..."

He looked up.

"You?"

Frank grinned and nodded, wrapping his arm around the younger boy's shoulders as they settled down to enjoy the show.

*  
*  
*

Gerard bounced excitedly as they left the theatre, his hand held securely in Frank’s.

"That was s-so good!..."

He exclaimed, a happy smile lighting up his face.

"I l-loved all the m-music."

Frank grinned, it wasn’t his kind of thing, but he’d watch it with Gerard a hundred times if it put that smile on his face.

"I’m glad you liked it. Time for ice cream now?"

Gerard nodded enthusiastically and they headed off down the street toward the parlour.

*  
*  
*

Gerard was rubbing his non-existent belly and groaning quietly...three scoops of ice cream had definitely been a bad idea. Frank chuckled as he carried the younger boy from the car, up to the front door...then set him down on his feet to dig out his keys.

"I think you could do with a nice warm bath before bed...what do you reckon baby? Sound good?"

Gerard nodded, leaning against Frank as he was unlocking the door. Frank pushed the door open and they stepped into the dark living room. He felt for the light switch and clicked it on...then they both froze to the spot. 

The room was trashed. Furniture was flipped and smashed, photos lay broken on the floor along with most of their large collection of dvds...and on the wall directly facing the front door, in large red letters were the words **_WE'RE COMING BACK FOR YOU GERARD!_**

Gerard whimpered, then his eyes rolled back and collapsed in a heap on the floor.

*  
*  
*

The Detectives came quickly. They scratched their heads for a while, wondering what they’d missed before, then suggested that Frank and Gerard stay somewhere else for a few nights while the whole house was fingerprinted, and the whole case was reviewed.  
Frank packed them both a bag and within an hour they were checking into a hotel in Newark.  
They waited silently for the elevator to take them to the third floor, with Gerard clinging shakily to Frank’s arm. When it arrived and the doors opened, Gerard gasped as a man with a beard was stood right in front of the doors. The man looked Gerard up and down with a smirk, then looked at Frank.

"How much?"

He slurred, drunkenly. 

"Fuck you."

Frank basically growled at the man as Gerard hid behind his boyfriend, trembling and trying to disappear. The man shrugged and stepped into the elevator as they stepped out and headed to their room. Once they were safely inside the room with the door locked, Gerard broke down in tears, collapsing against Frank’s chest. Frank took him over to the bed and carefully lay down with the boy curled up against him. He held him, cooing softly...he really didn’t know what else to do right now. 

Eventually, Gerard’s tears dried and Frank lifted the boy's chin so he could look into his eyes.

"I’m not gonna let anyone hurt you baby. Whoever’s doing this, they’re not gonna win...I promise you."

Gerard swallowed, sniffing miserably.

"Th-they g-got me once...what if they g-get me a-again?"

"No baby..."

Frank shook his head, cupping Gerard’s cheek and softly rubbing the pad of his thumb over the boy’s pale skin.

"That’s not happening. I’m not leaving your side for a moment until whoever did this is found and locked up...and if anyone tries to get to you, they’ll have to go through me first..."

He lay a small kiss to the tip of Gerard’s nose, making the younger boy giggle slightly.

"Trust me, Ok?"

Gerard nodded, then leaned up to place a small, hesitant kiss to Frank’s lips. Frank smiled wide as Gerard’s cheeks pinked.

"Is...is th-that Ok?"

Gerard asked timidly.

"Of course baby. I have always loved you and I know you don’t remember, and that it’s like you’re getting to know me from the start again, but anything you want to do...it’s ok with me."

Gerard nodded thoughtfully.

"I...I want t-to _try_ someth-thing...Ok?"

Frank nodded. He didn’t know what Gerard had in mind, but whatever it was, he was ok with it. Gerard took a deep breath, like he was preparing himself mentally for something...then, he moved himself from laying next to Frank, to laying on him, and leaned in to press his lips to the older man's again...for longer than a tiny second this time. Frank smiled into the kiss, gently wrapping his arms around Gerard’s slight body to hold him close. Frank let Gerard control the kiss...he didn’t want to scare him. After a few long, perfect moments, Gerard pulled back for air...his cheeks flushed pink, his lips slightly swollen and his eyes fluttering slowly open to look down at Frank.

"Was that...good?"

Frank chuckled lightly, his fingers running up and down the length of Gerard’s back. He nodded.

"It was perfect."

Gerard smiled happily.

"What if I w-wanted to t-try...more?"

Frank reached up to tuck Gerard’s hair behind his ear. Gerard leaned into the touch.

"Baby, I’ll never push you for anything you’re not comfortable with or ready for...anything we do, will be up to you."

Gerard nodded in understanding. He took another deep breath, then pushed himself to sit up. He was now straddling Frank’s hips, and Frank worried a little that the semi he was already sporting would scare the boy when he noticed it was pressed against his bottom. Gerard _did_ notice it, and the thought made his cheeks darken even more...but he found the realisation of what he was doing to Frank to be less scary, and more...exciting. Hesitantly, he shifted his hips, rubbing himself against Frank’s hardening length and drawing a quiet moan from the older man. Gerard giggled.

"You l-like that?"

"Oh yeah baby...I really do."

Frank moved his hands to _lightly_ rest on Gerard’s narrow hips...he didn’t want him to feel like he was trapped and couldn’t stop things if he wanted to. Gerard smiled shyly, then moved again...starting up a slow rhythm that Frank was pretty sure was going to drive him insane. Frank closed his eyes and Gerard’s confidence grew. He started to press down more as he felt his own cock hardening in his panties. He let out a soft whine at the feeling, making Frank open his eyes questioningly. Frank saw and felt the bulge forming in Gerard’s tight pants and it made his cock twitch heavily and his breath hitch. Before the abduction, this position would’ve inevitably lead to Gerard on his hand and knees, or on his back, with Frank buried balls deep in the younger boy's perfect ass as they both hurtled toward their completions...now though...

Frank groaned as he forced himself to not grip Gerard’s hips tight enough to bruise. He had to remind himself that the boy had been through Hell and if he were to flip them over now and pin Gerard beneath him, grinding against him while his hands fumbled to remove the boy’s clothing...well, Gerard would more than likely panic and he’d have every right to. Frank had said that he’d never push...and he meant that, with every fibre of his being.

Gerard’s eyes fluttered closed as he continued to grind down, circling his hips cause _damn_!...that felt good. Frank’s fingers tightened reflexively and Gerard gasped softly. Frank wanted to take Gerard like he used to. He wanted to be inside him, to mark him as his own again and show him that he was loved and desired. His fingers pushed up under the edge of Gerard's shirt to touch the boy’s delicate, pale skin. It was so soft and smooth and warm...Frank needed to feel more. He started to push the shirt up...but was stopped when he heard a choked sob and felt Gerard tense up and still. He opened his eyes...he didn’t even recall closing them...and looked up. Gerard’s eyes were wide and the blush had drained from his cheeks leaving him looking pale and frightened. Frank swallowed, slowly removing his hands from Gerard’s waist and placing them on the bed at either side of him. 

"Baby?..."

He said softly, trying not to spook the boy more. Gerard’s breath hitched again, but he didn’t move...or reply.

"It’s ok baby...I said I won’t push, and I meant it."

A shiver ran through Gerard’s body. Frank wanted to hold him close and comfort him, but clearly that wouldn’t be the right thing to do right now.

"S-sorry."

Gerard whimpered, his eyes casting down sadly.

"No no baby, you’ve got nothing to apologise for. Look, why don’t you have a nice hot bath, then we can snuggle up and get some sleep...how does that sound, hmm?"

Frank could feel that Gerard was no longer hard, his fear had chased his boner away...and Frank’s own cock had deflated the second he realised that he’d scared his precious baby. Nothing was happening now.

Gerard nodded slightly and shakily climbed off of Frank’s lap, still not meeting his eyes. Frank hated himself for scaring him.

"Do you want me to run the bath for you?...I think I saw a bottle of bubbles in there before."

Gerard shook his head.

"No thank you. I c-can do it."

He climbed off the bed and walked over to the ensuite, clicking on the light and stepping inside. A second later he re-emerged and crossed to the bag Frank had packed for them. He rooted around inside for a moment before pulling out a pair of pyjama pants and one of Frank’s old, faded band shirts, then returned to the bathroom, closing the door quietly behind him with a click.

Frank sighed, rubbing his hand over his face.

"Nice going moron."

He muttered to himself as he got up from the bed and stripped out of his jeans and hoodie. He would normally sleep in just his boxers, but after what just happened...  
He grabbed a pair of sweatpants from the bag and pulled them on before climbing back into the bed. 

*  
*  
*

It was a little over half an hour before Gerard reappeared. He was dressed in the pyjama pants and t-shirt and his hair was damp and slicked back to his head. He turned off the bathroom light and walked over to the bed, climbing quietly under the covers and cuddling straight into Frank’s side. Frank smiled sadly, wrapping one arm around him and gently squeezing his shoulder.

"You Ok baby?"

"Yeah. Just t-tired."

Frank sighed.

"I’m sorry I scared you."

Gerard looked up at him, frowning slightly.

"It wasn’t y-your fault F-Frankie. It’s th-theirs."

Frank smiled and nodded, leaning in to press a kiss to Gerard’s forehead.

"You’re right...and we’re not letting them win this, remember?"

Gerard smiled softly.

"Yeah..."

He yawned, snuggling his face into Frank’s chest.

"We'll b-be Ok...to-together."

"Yeah, we will. Try to sleep angel...I’m right here."

Gerard yawned again and nodded as his eyes slipped closed.

"G'night Frankie."

"Good night baby...I love you."

Frank whispered back, but Gerard was already asleep.


	6. 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When things go wrong, what do you do?...well Frank and Gerard run away, do you think it will help?
> 
>  
> 
> …………………………………………………………………

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi there guys, how’s you? 
> 
> So I’ve been ill for the last week and I’m still not 100%, but I’m getting there. I thought I should update this, even though I’m not desperately happy with the chapter...tell me what you think.
> 
> Hope you enjoy.
> 
> …………………………………………………………………

The next morning, Frank and Gerard were woken by a knock on their hotel room door. Gerard stayed in the bed, trembling slightly under the covers as Frank went to answer it. Yawning and rubbing his hand over his face, absently noting that he needed a shave, Frank opened the door to see the two detectives who were in charge of Gerard’s case now.

"Good morning Mr. Iero..."

"Frank, please."

The detective nodded and smiled politely.

"Ok, Good morning Frank. I’m sorry if we woke you, but we have some news. Can we come in?"

Frank looked back at Gerard, who nodded softly, the blankets pulled up nearly to his nose. Frank smiled gently at the younger boy before turning back to the detectives and nodding, opening the door more to let them in.

"Come in, I'll just grab a shirt..."

He wasn’t bothered that he was naked from the waist up, but he knew that not everyone was comfortable with it. He grabbed a random shirt from their bag and pulled it on, then climbed onto the bed next to Gerard, pulling him carefully into his side.

"Ok, so...news?"

The older of the two detectives, a large man with prematurely white hair and a bushy moustache that still held onto its original ginger colour, cleared his throat before he began.

"The man we arrested two months ago, Charles Redwood...we’ve had to release him."

Gerard whimpered and Frank held him closer, stroking his hair to calm him.

"Why?..."

Frank demanded.

"He confessed. It was _him_ who took Gerard."

The detective shook his head.

"We thought so too. It turns out that for the first three years that Gerard was missing, Mr. Redwood was actually in a mental institution in Wyoming...only about three miles from the hospital that Gerard ended up in. We’ve got confirmation that he was there just over six months before Gerard was taken too."

"But...his prints were on the photos!...he gave details!"

Again the detective shook his head.

"We questioned him again. He’s on medication now and he’s a lot more stable and lucid than when we talked to him before, and he remembers meeting a guy in a bar. The guy was wearing gloves. He gave him the photos and told him a story about abducting a young man with black hair, then took back the photos. Mr. Redwood was off his meds at the time and from what the doctors are telling us, he likely took the story as a memory. He was not involved in your abduction Gerard, I’m sorry."

Gerard sobbed slightly, burying his face into Frank’s shoulder as he shook. Frank sighed, holding him close.

"Where is he now?"

"Back in the institution, getting the help he needs. Unfortunately he couldn’t give us anything on the man from the bar though, he just can’t remember."

"So..."

Frank said with an exhausted sigh.

"We’re back to square one?"

"I’m sorry. We’re going back over every bit of evidence we have and we’re going to question Mr. Redwood again...but as of right now, yes, we’re at square one again. I really am sorry."

Frank could feel a headache coming on, he could also feel Gerard shaking badly against his side. He pressed a kiss to the top of the boy’s head as he ran his hand soothingly up and down his back.

"Thank you for coming to tell us..."

He said flatly.

"I...I think we just need some time alone now."

"Of course. We'll let you know when we have anything more."

Frank nodded and the detectives took their leave. A moment later, Gerard was crying his heart out into Frank’s shirt as the older man held him and wished death on whoever had dared to break his precious angel.

*  
*  
*

Gerard had eventually cried himself to sleep in Frank’s arms, so Frank took a few minutes to send a text to Mikey, explaining the latest developments and asking if he and Pete could clean up the house before he brought Gerard home. Just three minutes later, his phone buzzed with an incoming text from the younger man.

**Shit Frank. Is Gee Ok? Course we'll clean up. Let you know when it’s done. Later, M.**

Frank sighed, he knew he could rely on Mikey. Sure they’d had their disagreements and even come to blows in the past, but that was behind them now that Gerard was back. Now they were both on the same page, the one that said to do whatever it took to keep Gee happy and safe. He sent a quick thank you text, telling briefly how Gerard had cried himself to sleep, then set his phone back on the nightstand before wrapping both arms around Gerard and closing his eyes, hopefully his headache would be gone the next time he woke up.

*  
*  
*

It was shortly after midday when Frank woke again to Gerard whimpering and squirming in his sleep. He cooed to him, stroking fingers through his hair and over his soft pale cheek until with a little gasp, Gerard woke, pretty green eyes fluttering open to look up at Frank.

"Hi baby...nightmare again?..."

Gerard nodded, pressing into Frank’s chest for comfort.

"Anything new, or the same as before?"

"S-same."

Frank sighed, softly kissing Gerard’s forehead.

"I’m right here baby and I’m never letting anyone hurt you...you know that, right?"

Gerard nodded shyly.

"I kn-know. I just...I just th-thought it was over."

"We all did sweetheart, but whatever happens, we’re not letting them win...remember?"

"Yeah. As l-long as we're t-together, we win, th-they lose."

"That’s right baby, and we _are_ gonna win, I believe that totally and you need to as well, Ok?"

Gerard nodded, just as Frank’s cellphone buzzed a message. Frank reached over to the nightstand and picked the phone up, tapping on the message icon. It was a text from Mikey.

**Hey Frank. We’ve sorted the house, had to throw out a couple pics of you and Gee cause they were drawn on, sorry. Got locks changed, new keys at ours. Phone when you’re coming to get them. Later, M.**

*  
*  
*

Frank and Gerard took their time with breakfast in the hotel room, delivered by room service that Gerard hid from in the bathroom. After they’d eaten, Gerard picking nervously at his food and barely managing half, they got dressed and headed home...stopping on the way to pick up the new keys from Mikey and Pete. They didn’t stay for long, declining Mikey’s offer of coffee in favour of just grabbing the keys and heading back to the house, but when they got there, seeing everything back in it’s place...minus the photographs of their past that Gerard had grown to love because of the stories that Frank told about them...Gerard kinda wished that they’d said yes to the coffee.

Frank told Gerard that he was pretty sure he’d still got at least _most_ of the missing photos on either his computer, or on a memory card, and that he could reprint the pictures, but Gerard was still upset, and the thought that someone had focused most of their destructive energy on destroying the images of memories Gerard didn’t even have...well that was enough to have him in tears for most of the day.

They spent the afternoon quietly cuddled up on the couch watching movies, then made and ate veggie burgers together before heading up to bed at just after ten. Gerard fell asleep with tears on his face and Frank’s warm arms wrapped around him, but Frank couldn’t sleep and lay awake wishing he knew how to make this nightmare all go away.

*  
*  
*

It was a little after two in the morning when Frank’s cellphone buzzed a message from the nightstand. He was still awake, so careful not to wake Gerard, he reached over and picked the phone up. The screen was set on low light because of the time, but it was bright enough for Frank to see that it was text from a private number. Frowning, he clicked on the text. The text was just four words, four words that made him feel physically sick.

**We're coming for him!**

Frank swallowed hard, looking down at the boy in his arms that he would give his life to protect. He took a couple of deep, steadying breaths...then deleted the message...he didn’t want Gerard to see it and freak out. He set the phone back on the nightstand and wrapped his arms back around Gerard’s slight body. No, no one was going to hurt Gerard again...even if he had to kill them to keep his beautiful boy safe.

*  
*  
*

When the morning finally came, Frank made a suggestion.

"Baby, I was thinking...why don’t we go away for a bit, like on vacation."

Gerard looked up from his spot tucked into Frank’s side as they cuddled in bed. He tilted his head slightly as he thought about it, then smiled.

"Where were you th-thinking?"

Frank leaned in to press a soft kiss to the boy’s forehead.

"Well I was thinking of somewhere we’ve been before, somewhere hot. I was thinking Hawaii...but the problem is..."

He paused and Gerard hummed quietly for him to continue. He sighed, smiling reassuringly.

"The problem is that we’d have to fly."

Gerard stiffened slightly, then relaxed, sucking his lower lip into his mouth while he considered this. After a minute or so, his brow furrowed in concentration, he finally released his lip and smiled up at Frank.

"Y-you’d stay with me all the t-time?..."

Frank nodded.

"Th-they can’t get me there...right?"

"Baby, I’m never gonna let them get you, no matter where we are."

Gerard hummed quietly, then nodded.

"Ok, we can f-fly."

Frank grinned wide, holding Gerard close to him and pressing a kiss to his cheek.

"It’ll be great baby, you’ll see. Let’s go get some breakfast, then we can look online for last minute flights...Ok?"

Gerard smiled and nodded, and then they started their day. As it happened, they found a last minute deal to fly out the very next day, so they spent most of their day packing and making various arrangements. By the time they returned to their bed that night, everything was organised and they were both excited for their trip. Sleep came quickly and was thankfully uninterrupted, and then morning greeted them with soft light through the curtains.

"Morning baby, you looking forward to our trip?"

Gerard yawned, pushing his face into Frank’s chest.

"Yeah, just...just s-scared."

"Of the plane?"

Gerard nodded, opening his eyes and looking up at Frank.

"How l-long's the flight?"

"About nine hours, give or take"

"Th-that’s long. Will we get f-food?"

Frank chuckled.

"Yeah, but it probably won’t be too nice. We can get breakfast at the airport before we fly if you like?"

Gerard smiled and nodded.

"Ok. We should get up now, right?"

"Yeah baby. Why don’t you jump in the shower first while I double check we’ve got everything, then I’ll go in after you."

Gerard nodded and they climbed out of bed. An hour later they were out the door, half an hour after that they were parked in the long stay parking lot and checking in for their flight. Gerard clung to Frank as they were surrounded by hundreds of people, all hurrying to get where they were going. He buried his face into Frank’s shoulder when security said he had to go through the metal detector alone, but after a brief freak out and Frank holding him, cooing reassurances into his ear, he eventually took a deep breath, nodded, then went through before they headed off to find a nice little breakfast place and sat down to eat bagels with cream cheese.

Honestly the plane wasn’t as scary as Gerard had thought it would be, and apart from the take off and landing when he squeezed Frank’s hand so hard that he had to apologise afterward, he actually coped really well.

Security in Hawaii was almost as scary for Gerard as it had been in Newark, but with Frank by his side, he got through without any issues and they were soon climbing into a taxi and heading to their hotel. Gerard smiled wide as he watched the beautiful scenery out of the cab's window, one hand tangled with Frank’s lightly...relaxed, not tense. He turned his head to grin at Frank, who smiled back, lifting Gerard’s hand to kiss his fingertips softly.

"It’s so p-pretty here Frank. I w-wish I remembered c-coming here before."

Frank sighed, wrapping his arms around the younger boy and pulling him gently back against his chest.

"I know baby, but we'll make new memories, I promise."


	7. 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sunshine, returning memories and SMUT!!!...oh my ;)
> 
>  
> 
> …………………………………………………………………

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi there guys, how’s you? 
> 
> So my life is still being pretty shit, but I’m working things through and trying to carry on. Writing is hard for me right now and I’ve basically cut myself off from everyone...big SORRY to my lovely friends who deserve better, I’ll try to be back with you soon babes, love you all.
> 
> Anyway, hope you enjoy this chapter <3
> 
>  
> 
> …………………………………………………………………

 

After arriving at the hotel and checking in, Frank and Gerard headed up to their room and crashed for a couple of hours...it was just three in the afternoon here, but their body clocks were still on Jersey time, so it felt like nearly eight. Frank set an alarm for three hours and they took a nap together before dinner.

The alarm on Frank’s phone went off at ten to six and Gerard gasped as he woke, startled by the sound and momentarily confused as to where they were. Frank calmed him quickly, then they got up, freshened up in the large ensuite and changed into shorts and shirts...then headed out.  
Hand in hand, they left the hotel and walked to a little open air restaurant they’d spotted when they first arrived. It was right on the beach with a beautiful view of the ocean, and the menu looked amazing.

"What do you fancy baby?"

Frank asked as they looked over the simple but tasty looking array of food...most of which was seafood, of course. Gerard hummed thoughtfully, reading the descriptions.

"Well, this looks good...what do _you_ think?"

He pointed to the Grilled Salmon with Hawaiian Salsa, then looked up at Frank with wide, questioning eyes. It still amazed Frank that Gerard could look so young and innocent...after all he’d been through. He nodded and smiled.

"Yeah baby, that looks really good. I think I’ll have that too."

Gerard smiled happily, then hid his face in Frank’s shoulder as Frank gave their order to the waiter, a rather large native Hawaiian man with a lot of traditional tattoos and a bright, friendly smile. When the waiter had gone, Frank encouraged Gerard to come back out.

"You’re safe here baby. No one's gonna hurt you."

"I...I know Frankie. I know you’ll k-keep me safe."

He smiled softly and snuggled into Frank’s side as they sat and watched the surf...quietly sipping their tropical rum drinks. Frank held Gerard’s hand under the table as they ate, happily enjoying the peaceful setting and the changing sky as the sun sank into the ocean.

"Do you wanna go for a walk on the beach after this?"

He asked, getting a soft smile and nod in return.

"Sounds good..."

Gerard answered quietly.

"Can I t-take off my shoes?"

Frank smiled wide and nodded.

"Of course you can baby, I’m going to. We can dip out toes in the water too, if you like."

Gerard giggled.

"Yeah, I’d l-like that."

After they’d finished eating, Frank paid and they headed down onto the sand, taking off their shoes to walk barefoot to the water's edge, hand in hand. The sun had almost dipped below the horizon, but the sky still held a soft pinkish glow. Frank knew that before Gerard was taken, he would’ve loved to paint that view, now though...he wished Gerard remembered his art, it may have helped with his nerves.

"Are you happy Gee?"

Gerard looked up from watching the water lapping softly at his toes. The setting sun cast a warm glow on his pale cheeks. He smiled serenely, nodding.

"I am. I l-like it here. It’s so qu-quiet and beautiful."

"Like you my love."

Frank said with a smile, reaching up to tuck Gerard’s hair behind his ear as a warm breeze caught it. Gerard giggled, a blush spreading on his cheeks as he looked down shyly. Frank smiled, wrapping his arms around Gerard’s tiny waist and pulling him in close. Gerard snuggled into Frank’s chest, sighing happily as he looked out over the water.

"Can we s-stay here?"

"You don’t want to walk?"

Gerard lifted his head to meet Frank’s eyes.

"No, I mean can we stay here...always?"

"You don’t want to go home?"

Gerard shook his head sadly.

"Jersey doesn’t feel s-safe."

Frank sighed deeply, pulling Gerard back into his chest and softly kissing the top of his head.

"I know baby, but it will. The cops will catch the monsters and you know...I’ll never let anyone hurt you."

Gerard huffed slightly, but then nodded.

"I know..."

He said softly before looking up.

"Shall we w-walk now?"

Frank smiled warmly at him and nodded.

"Of course baby, whatever you want."

He took Gerard’s small pale hand in his again and they started a slow, quiet walk along the edge of the water, watching as the sun finally set, and a beautiful full moon lit up the beach in it’s cool white glow.

*  
*  
*

It was a little after eleven when they returned to the hotel, brushing dried sand off their feet before heading back up to their room. Gerard leaned against Frank sluggishly in the hallway as the older man unlocked the door with a keycard. Once inside, with the door locked...

"Do you want to shower before bed baby?..."

Gerard shook his head, an odd look on his face that Frank couldn’t quite identify.

"Baby?"

Gerard swallowed, pushing his nerves down as he stepped closer, slightly shaky fingers moving to the buttons of Frank’s shirt. Frank stayed still, eyes watching as his shirt was slowly opened, then pushed off of his shoulders. He let it fall to the floor, then moved one hand up to Gerard’s chin, gently raising it to look in the boy’s eyes.

"Is this what you really want to do Gee?"

Gerard swallowed, then nodded slightly.

"I’m r-ready."

Frank hummed, leaning in to press a light kiss to Gerard’s soft pink lips.

"Ok baby, we’ll go as slow as you need. You want to stop...we stop. Ok?"

Gerard nodded, relief in his eyes and a small smile on his lips as he accepted another kiss, leaning into it and winding his arms around Frank’s neck. Frank ran his hands lightly up and down Gerard’s back to keep him calm as he kissed him tenderly...he didn’t want to scare him again. As Gerard relaxed more, Frank testingly slid one hand down to cup Gerard’s ass, squeezing gently. Gerard gasped slightly, tensing for just a moment before he relaxed again, whining into the kiss and pressing himself against Frank more. Frank could feel that Gerard was getting hard in his shorts, the boy was pressed against him in the most delicious way, so he was sure Gerard could feel him too. 

Gerard whimpered, grinding himself against Frank needily.

"F-Frankie."

"Yes baby?..."

Frank moved his lips along Gerard’s jaw to suck and lick carefully just below the boy’s right ear. Gerard tilted his head to give Frank more room.

"Tell me what you want."

Frank murmured against his skin. Gerard whined.

"Need...you."

"I’m here baby. Can I undress you?..."

Gerard whimpered, nodding as his own fingers moved to quickly unbutton his shirt. Frank brushed them aside to do it himself, having Gerard topless in just a moment. He ran his fingers over the boy’s soft pale skin, watching as a pink blush spread over his chest, just as it had done on his cheeks.

"So beautiful..."

He murmured, hesitating with his fingertips on the button of Gerard’s cotton shorts.

"May I?"

Gerard nodded, trapping his lower lip between his teeth as his hips twitched. Frank smirked slightly, undoing the boy’s shorts, then pushing them down until they fell to pool at Gerard’s feet. His breath caught at the sight of Gerard’s hard cock, straining against soft blue lace, already damp from pre-cum. Gerard whimpered and Frank looked up, wanting to be sure he hadn’t frightened him or moved too fast. He was reassured when he saw the needy, want filled look in Gerard’s eyes and took hold of the top edge of the panties, carefully pulling them down until the boy’s hard cock sprung free, Gerard gasping as his knees trembled beneath him. Frank sunk down onto his knees as he slid the panties to the floor, then took them and the shorts off of Gerard’s feet to leave the boy naked before him.

"Please?"

Gerard whimpered needily. Frank looked up and smiled, carefully placing his hands on the boy’s slim hips.

"I got you baby..."

He leaned in and licked carefully at the tip, making Gerard gasp, his hands going to Frank’s shoulders for support. He looked up.

"You like that baby?..."

Gerard nodded, unable to verbalise an answer.

"You want more?"

Gerard nodded again quickly. Frank chuckled softly, then leaned in and took the head of Gerard’s cock into his mouth, keeping eye contact as he slid his mouth further down until he could feel the boy pressing into the back of his throat. Gerard cried out, his knees buckling...he knew they’d done this stuff before, but it was like it was his first time and _boy!_ was it amazing!  
Frank pulled off as he felt Gerard’s knees go, even though he knew he could hold him up. He quickly stood and scooped Gerard up, carrying him over to the bed and laying him down before leaning over him to kiss him softly, then standing up to remove his own remaining clothes. Gerard watched him with heavily lidded eyes, his legs unconsciously spread slightly apart, and his cock laying heavy and dark on his pale belly, a small pool of pre-cum collecting in his bellybutton.

"Are you sure about this Gee?..."

Gerard nodded silently. Frank raised an eyebrow.

"I need to hear you say it baby."

Gerard swallowed, then nodded again, more surely this time.

"I w-want this Frankie...I want _you_."

Frank smiled and nodded, reaching into his bag on the floor and pulling out a little bottle of lube, then crawling onto the bed between Gerard’s legs and again taking the boy’s gorgeous cock into his mouth. Gerard’s back arched off the bed and his toes curled, a porn-worthy moan escaping his lips, and his eyes practically rolling back into his scull. Frank swallowed around the tip as he used Gerard’s pre-cum to lube his fingers. He then pulled off a bit to let Gerard relax as he moved his slick fingertips to the younger man's hole. He looked up to gauge Gerard’s reaction.

"I’ll go slow. If you want me to stop, tell me."

Gerard nodded, lifting his head slightly to meet Frank’s eyes.

"Go ahead...I’m r-ready."

Frank smiled softly, pressing a light kiss to Gerard’s inner thigh before starting to slowly press one finger in. Gerard tensed for a breath, then relaxed, letting his breath out and focussing on the way Frank’s lips felt on his thigh and his finger felt sliding deep inside him. He closed his eyes and breathed, his fingers twisting in the sheets and soft whimpers and sighs slipping from his parted lips.  
After a few minutes. Frank moved to two fingers, taking the tip of Gerard’s cock into his mouth again to distract him as he sobbed slightly from the stretch. It hurt, but Gerard had known it would...he also knew that the pain wouldn’t last for long, and that soon everything would feel so much better.  
Frank’s fingertips brushed something inside and Gerard saw stars, a high breathy whine leaving his lips as his back arched again. Frank focussed on that spot, adding a third finger after a minute as he continued to suck the tip of Gerard’s now throbbing cock...he wasn’t going to last long.

"Please. P-please?"

"Come on baby, cum for me beautiful."

"But I...I w-want you...inside."

Frank moved his hand that was three fingers deep in Gerard’s ass, to the boy’s leaking cock, using the pre-cum to slick his movements as he started to stroke him quickly.

"I will baby. I’ll make love to you after you cum for me. I want you to cum twice for me tonight...do you want that too? Do you think you can?"

"Yes, ah yes! Please please F-Frankie please ahhh..."

Frank smiled as he continued to work Gerard toward his completion, he knew he would be more relaxed once he’d cum. 

"So...c-close."

"That’s it baby, you can do it. Cum for me."

"Ahhhhh!"

Gerard came with a cry as Frank stroked him through till the end, then carefully released his sensitive cock.

"Well done baby. You were so good for me..."

Frank moved up over Gerard’s flushed and sweat slick body, licking a line through the boy’s cum and sweat before pressing a soft kiss over his rapidly beating heart. He then leaned up to kiss his lips tenderly.

"Do you still want me to make love to you?"

Gerard opened his eyes slowly, a blissed out expression on his face as he focused on Frank. He smiled and nodded.

"More than a-anything Frankie."

He said softly, leaning up to connect their lips again.

They made love for the first time in nearly five and a half years that night, reconnecting in the most intimate way possible, and although Gerard felt a tiny moment of panic when Frank entered him, he managed to breath through it, and they spent the night tangled in each other, soft moans and wanton cries filling the air until they eventually fell asleep as dawn's early sunlight began to peek over the horizon.

*  
*  
*

It was nearly noon when they woke again, smiling softly at each other, in no real hurry to get out of bed. After a while though, they began to realise that the sheets that had been so cool and soft last night, now were stiff, and stuck to their skin in places. Disgusted, but giggling because there was some poor hotel employee who would have to wash those sheets, they climbed reluctantly out of bed and shared a shower...another first in a long time. They washed each other off, kissing and exchanging lazy morning hand jobs before getting out, drying off, then dressing and leaving to go find food.

Nowhere was really serving breakfast foods at this time, but neither of them were overly hungry, and decided on BBQ Pork Tacos that they could eat while they walked. There were a lot more people out than there had been the previous evening, but somehow Gerard didn’t feel all that bothered by them. He held Frank’s hand as they walked and took in the sights, sounds and smells of the island, until suddenly Gerard stopped dead in his tracks, his eyes wide and his mouth hanging open.

"Baby? Baby, what’s wrong?"

Frank panicked, standing right in front of the younger boy and cupping his cheek as he tried to meet his eyes. Gerard looked like he’d seen a ghost.

"I remember..."

He breathed after a minute, during which Frank feared he’d lost Gerard all over again. His eyes focused on Frank and a smile spread on his lips.

"Frankie! I remember coming here before...right here...with you, Mikey, mom, dad and your mom."

Frank’s eyes widened and he laughed out of surprise.

"You do?...what, when we were kids?..."

Gerard nodded enthusiastically and Frank grinned, taking both of Gerard’s hands and guiding him over to sit on a bench nearby.

"Tell me?"

Gerard giggled that light, carefree laugh Frank loved and hadn’t heard in oh so very long. A happy tear slipped from the boy’s eye as he recounted the memory of a vacation the two families had taken together. Gerard had been just twelve and Frank was coming up for sixteen, but they were already really close, the best of friends long before they became more. Gerard remembered them laughing as they ran away from Mikey who wanted to hang out with them, but because he was only ten and an annoying little shit at the time, they didn’t want him to. Frank laughed...he remembered that. He remembered how they’d gotten in trouble for ditching him too, and had to spend the whole next day with him on the beach.

"I remember it all so c-clearly Frankie...but..."

Gerard looked down, his shoulders sagging.

"But?"

Frank asked, gently lifting Gerard’s chin with his fingertips to see not so happy tears in his eyes.

"But I still don’t remember anything else. Not growing up, our lives together...nothing."

Frank sighed, gently pulling Gerard to sit in his lap, wrapping his arms around him and holding him close.

"It’ll come my love, you’ll remember one day. This proves it, doesn’t it?..."

Gerard looked up questioningly and Frank smiled softly at him, brushing his hair from his face while still holding him close.

"You’ve remembered that holiday, so somehow, somewhere in your mind, all of the rest of your life is just waiting for you to rediscover it...we just have to find the right things or places to trigger those memories...you get it?"

Gerard sighed, a small smile making it's way back onto his lips.

"Yeah, I g-guess you’re right. And I should be h-happy that my first memory to c-come back was a nice one...right?"

Frank smiled, pressing a kiss to Gerard’s lips then encouraging the boy to rest his head on his shoulder.

"Yeah baby, that’s so, so good."

Frank knew the first memory could’ve been one of nightmare like tortures, of rape and pain and horrors beyond imagining. He was so very glad it wasn’t.

*  
*  
*

That night, after walking, talking and Gerard having a few more tiny flashes of vacations past, they’d gone back to their room, ordered room service and fallen asleep wrapped up in each other’s arms...in blissfully clean sheets.

In the early hours of the morning, with the first glow of dawn just starting to lighten the room, Frank woke up needing a piss. Untangling himself gingerly from Gerard’s arms, he slipped out of bed and crossed sleepily to the bathroom. After peeing and washing his hands, Frank left the bathroom and headed back toward the bed. He was just about to get back beneath the sheets, when a quiet noise caught his attention and he looked over toward the door. On the floor, having apparently been just pushed under the door, was a folded piece of paper. Frank frowned and walked over. He looked out of the spy hole, but the hallway was empty. Frowning again, he bent down and picked up the paper, looking at it curiously. It was folded four times, and when he unfolded it and looked inside, his heart just about stopped. Just two words were written on the paper, words that meant the end of their carefree vacation.

 

 

**_~We're here!~_ **


	8. 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Going home means going back to reality...but it could also bring them something else.
> 
>  
> 
> …………………………………………………………………

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi there guys, sorry this update is late, but life’s a bitch and she’s been kicking me in the head for a while now...but here you are, the last proper chapter. There will be an epilogue, but you’re gonna have to be patient and wait for it.
> 
> Hope you enjoy this chapter.  
> Xxx
> 
>  
> 
> …………………………………………………………………

Frank looked over at Gerard, curled up on his side and for once...sleeping peacefully. He didn’t want their happy vacation to end and he didn’t want Gerard to be scared again, but he knew he couldn’t keep this from him...he _could_ let him rest for a little while more though. He crossed to the side of the bed and picked up his cell, then took it into the bathroom and called the front desk of the hotel. His call was picked up on the second ring.

"Aloha, Ohana Waikiki Malia hotel, Kona Kalakaua speaking, how can I help you?"

"Aloha..."

Frank greeted the woman quietly, not wanting to wake Gerard up.

"This is Frank Iero in room 316, I have a problem and need to speak to the manager...if that’s possible?"

"Certainly Mr. Iero, he’s here right now. I’ll pass you over."

"Thank you."

Frank listened as the phone was passed over to the manager, a few quiet words exchanged before a deep male voice sounded in his ear.

"Good morning Mr. Iero, I’m Adam Noshimuri, the general manager. Miss Kalakaua tells me you have a problem?"

"Yes, Good morning..."

Frank took a breath, then continued...picking his words carefully.

"My fiancé and I have been subject to harassment for some time now, which is why we came here to the island...to get away..."

The manager hummed for Frank to carry on.

"A note was slipped under our door a few minutes ago that indicates that we’ve been followed here. I was hoping that you could check your security cameras and see if there’s a clear picture of whoever left the note."

"I can certainly do that Mr. Iero. It was a few minutes ago you say?"

"Yes, about five minutes."

The manager hummed again and Frank heard tapping that sounded like fingers on a keyboard for a minute, then the manager's voice returned.

"Mr. Iero?..."

Frank hummed in acknowledgement.

"I have cctv of someone in dark jeans and a dark hooded top posting the note under your door...but they kept their head down, the camera didn’t see their face..."

The manager grumbled something that Frank couldn’t hear, then let out an audible sigh.

"I’ve just used the hotel's cameras to track this person from the moment they entered the hotel, to the moment they left...and the cameras didn’t catch their face once. It actually looks like they knew where the cameras were and actively avoided them. I’m sorry."

Frank sighed heavily.

"It’s ok. I should’ve expected that, they’ve been pretty clever so far..."

He rubbed his hand over his face tiredly.

"Could you possibly make a copy of the video tracking them?...there might be something that could help the police back home."

"Of course. I’ll have it waiting for you at reception when you’re ready to collect it. Is there anything else I can do for you?...a change of room perhaps?"

Frank thought about it, and sighed.

"I’ll discuss it with my fiancé when he wakes up and let you know. Thank you."

"Of course. Anything to help. Enjoy your stay Mr. Iero."

"Thanks, we'll try."

Frank hung up and looked at the paper in his hand again. Whoever had taken Gerard, had _hurt_ Gerard...they were here. They’d followed them, but to what end? Were they just trying to scare them, or were they coming after Gerard again? Either way, Frank knew he had to keep Gerard safe, but that he couldn’t keep him in the dark forever...he would have to show him the note when he woke up.

*  
*  
*

Of course, the note had Gerard in tears. He cried and clung to Frank, shaking in terror.

"Why won’t th-they l-leave us al-lone?"

He sobbed, burying his face in Frank’s shirt as Frank held him tight, rocking him gently and trying to reassure him that everything would be ok...even though Frank was no long so certain that it would be.

"I don’t know baby, but I’m not gonna let them hurt you. I swear to you Gee, I’ll kill them before they ever lay a hand on you again."

Gerard lifted his face, wet, red rimmed eyes staring up imploringly at the older man.

"Y-you’d _k-kill_ them?"

He stuttered out disbelievingly. Frank nodded slightly.

"I’d do whatever it took to keep you safe."

Gerard nodded, then rested his head against Frank’s chest, trembling and sniffing as he tried to calm his breathing and listen to Frank’s heart beating strong and true next to his ear.

"I...I want to go home..."

He whispered after a minute, then looked up through wet lashes.

"Take me h-home Frank?"

"Of course my love, anything you want."

Once Gerard was calm enough, he started to pack up the few things they’d taken out of their bags, while Frank called the airline and changed their flights home. They had booked the vacation for a fortnight, but luckily the airline was understanding and only charged them a small amount for altering their return date, rather than charging them for completely new tickets.  
The flight home was set for 8:40 that evening, so they spent the day quietly cuddled up in their hotel room before taking a cab to the airport just after seven. 

Gerard clung to Frank and barely spoke, keeping his head down and trembling whenever anyone came too close. Frank hated whoever had done this to his baby, more than he ever thought he could hate anyone.

The plane was on time and there was a slight headwind, so it landed back in a rainy and cold Jersey at a couple of minutes before midday. After collecting their bags, they made their way to the long stay parking and found the car, then drove back to their house in a tired silence. Gerard was curled into himself, wearing one of Frank’s baggy sweaters with the sleeves pulled down over his hands and his arms wrapped around himself as he stared unseeingly out of the window at the rain...Frank had to say his name four times to get his attention when they pulled into the driveway.

"We're home baby. Let’s get inside and I’ll order us a pizza...how does that sound?"

Gerard shrugged slightly, eyes cast down.

"I’m not hungry."

He said flatly. Frank frowned, reaching up to tuck the boy’s hair behind his ear.

"You gotta eat baby. You can’t let them win."

Gerard swallowed, looking up sadly.

"Haven’t they won already Frank?"

There was a defeat in his eyes that broke Frank's heart in two. Gerard sighed, then climbed out of the car and walked up onto the porch, waiting under the shelter for Frank to come open the door. Frank clenched his fists on the steering wheel...he really wanted to hit something right now. He wished he still had his old punching bag in the garage, but that was long gone. Taking a breath, he climbed out and fetched their bags from the trunk before joining Gerard on the porch. He unlocked the door and let them into the house, then Gerard went straight to the bathroom and locked himself in. 

Frank tried talking to him through the door, but all Gerard would say was that he was ok and that he just needed to be alone for a while. Frank heard water running and assumed Gerard was taking a bath. He told him that he would be in the living room if he needed anything, then told him that he loved him, and left him to bathe in peace.

Frank was sat on the couch with an old movie on low an hour or so later when he heard the bathroom door open. He heard light footsteps along the hall, then the bedroom door closing. He sighed and waited, hoping that Gerard would come down soon. After a while, realising that Gerard wasn’t coming, he stood from the sofa and went upstairs. Cracking the bedroom door open slightly, he peered into the dim room. The curtains were closed and Gerard was curled up in the bed, snoring quietly, dark hair spread out on the pillow and the tip of his thumb tucked into his mouth. Frank sighed, shook his head sadly, then closed the door and headed back downstairs. He thought about ordering food, but honestly he wasn’t feeling that hungry either.

The movie Frank had put on was finished, and now there was a rerun of some old sitcom that he was fairly sure he used to watch with his mom when he was small, but now it was only background noise. He lay on the couch, eyes on the tv and mind on his beautiful boy. He wanted to go back up there and cuddle with him, but Gerard had said he needed to be alone for a while...he would give him that... _for a while_.

*  
*  
*

Frank didn’t remember falling asleep on the couch, but it was dark when he was woken up by the sound of screaming...coming from upstairs. Suddenly wide awake, he dashed up the stairs two at a time and barrelled into the bedroom, nearly falling over in shock at what he saw.

In the corner of the room, curled up in a ball with his arms over his head was Gerard...and standing over him was a man in black. Regaining his senses quickly, Frank rushed the man and tackled him to the ground. A knife that Frank hadn’t seen flew from the man's hand and slid across the wooden floor, disappearing under the dresser in the corner. The man struggled to break free, grunting and cursing at Frank as he tried to hold onto him. The man's hood slipped down and Frank gasped, shocked recognition rendering him immobile for a moment...just long enough for the man to elbow him in the gut and wriggle free. The man was up and running from the room before Frank could even catch his breath again.

Hearing footsteps thundering down the stairs, then the front door opening and slamming shut, Frank knew that the man was gone. He turned his head to the corner, where Gerard was curled up, shaking and crying, white as a sheet with eyes as big as saucers as he stared open mouthed at their open bedroom door.

"Gee?..."

Frank moved slowly, spoke quietly so as not to spook him.

"Baby, look at me..."

Gerard’s eyes flicked to Frank, then back to the door...Frank could see him shaking and hear his breaths coming in quick, panicked gasps.

"Baby, he’s gone now. Look at me..."

Gerard’s whole body shook as he took in a deep, shuddery breath...then he swallowed and slowly turned his head toward Frank, eyes still frighteningly wide. Frank smiled softly as he moved slowly toward him.

"It’s ok now...I’m here..."

Gerard sobbed, then swallowed and nodded slightly...Frank could see the tears soaking the boy’s ghostly white cheeks, and he wanted to kiss them away. He got to within a couple of feet of Gerard, and stopped, opening his arms to him. Gerard stared at him for a moment, then practically threw himself into Frank’s chest, cling on tight and burying his face as huge ugly sobs sounded muffled through the room. Frank wrapped his arms around him and held him tight, rocking him and humming softly as he swore to himself that he would kill that bastard if he ever laid eyes on him again.

*  
*  
*

An hour later, Frank was sat in the living room with Gerard curled up in his lap and the two detectives who had been dealing with their case, sitting on the couch opposite them. There were CSIs upstairs taking fingerprints and retrieving the knife, while the detectives took the two men's statements.

"And you recognised him?"

The older detective asked with interest. Frank nodded.

"Yeah...yes, I did. We went to school with him, his name's Bob."

"Bob?"

"Yeah...sorry...Robert, Bryar."

"Robert Bryar..."

The detective wrote down the name.

"And do you know why he would’ve done any of this?"

Frank sighed, hugging Gerard a little tighter as he felt him shudder against him.

"He asked me out once, a long time ago. I said no cause I already knew that Gerard was the only one for me."

"How did he take that?"

The other detective asked. Frank chuckled, but the sound held no mirth.

"We never spoke again, but I’d say he took it badly."

"Do you think he would be capable of taking Gerard?...do you think he could’ve done it all?"

Frank frowned, thinking for a minute...then shrugged.

"I don’t know. Like I said, we never spoke again. Who knows how far he’d go?"

The detectives both asked a few more questions, then left the pair in peace...with two uniformed officers in a car out front and another two in the house with them. Neither of them slept that night.

*  
*  
*

It was two days later when the detectives returned with news. Robert 'Bob' Bryar had committed subside by cop after a three hour armed standoff with the local police. He had used his eight year old niece as a hostage until somehow she’d managed to get far enough away from him for the cops to move in, then he’d refused to drop his weapon and attacked the officers. They’d had no choice in the end and he’d died of a gunshot wound to the chest, bleeding out in the ambulance five minutes away from the hospital. 

Bob's apartment had been searched and details of a farmhouse in Wyoming that had been passed to him when his uncle died, were found. There was also a box full of graphic photos of Gerard from during the time he was held captive, and video files on the man's laptop of him beating and raping the terrified boy. 

The detectives told Frank and Gerard that the police in Afton had already been to the farm and found a soundproof room in the basement that was set up as a torture chamber. There was blood and other things that the CSIs were testing, but they were already certain that this was where Gerard had been held. 

"There’s no indication that anyone else was involved. Of course, we’re waiting on all the fingerprints and swabs to know for sure, but as of right now...I feel confident to tell you that it’s over."

Frank smiled softly, holding Gerard to him.

"I think we'll wait til the tests are in before we relax though...if you don’t mind."

The detective chuckled softly, shaking his head.

"Of course...and I’ll let you know personally when those results are in, Ok?"

"Thank you...for everything."

The detective smiled and shook Frank’s hand, then Frank and Gerard were left in peace once more...without uniformed cops in their home this time. 

*  
*  
*

Three days later, at just after four in the afternoon, the detective turned up at their front door to give them the good news...the tests were all back and the fingerprints, blood and other samples had been checked thoroughly, and apart from Gerard’s and Bob's, there was no sign that anyone else had been in that basement room...ever.

It was official...it was over.

*  
*  
*

Finally, after all the pain, fear, heartache and heartbreak...finally, Frank and Gerard could get on with their lives...together.

 

 

**NOTES**

 

So we’ve come to the end of the story, but there is just a little more to tell...so, stick around, because there will be an epilogue. Hope you’ve enjoyed reading this fic as much as I’ve enjoyed writing it.  
Xxx


	9. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Two months later...
> 
>  
> 
> …………………………………………………………………

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi there guys, how’s you? 
> 
> So this is the end, and I can’t promise you’ll like me after you’ve read it...but this was ALWAYS the way I was going to finish this fic.
> 
> There will not be a sequel, so please don’t ask. I’ve been working on this fic for a really long time and it’s finally finished, so now I can get on with something else.
> 
> Hope you enjoy this ;)
> 
>  
> 
> …………………………………………………………………

_~time stamp- two months later, Thanksgiving~_

 

Gerard wished that he remembered all of his life from before he was taken, but he was getting more and more memories back every day, and each one was bringing him closer to Frank and their life together. Unfortunately, he was also getting more memories back from his time in Bob's evil clutches. Every night it seemed that a new glimpse of his missing five years would reveal itself to him in his nightmares. Sometimes he would see Bob's face glaring down at him, while other times he would still appear faceless...just a blur or a mask. Gerard had tried hypnotherapy with Dr. Urie, but still things were unclear most of the time. Dr. Urie said that this was to be expected after all Gerard had gone through, but that didn’t exactly make it easier to deal with.

Physically, Gerard was healing well now. He had put on enough weight that he no longer resembled a walking skeleton, and he was able to eat more than a dozen bites without feeling full...it was good progress and his doctors were pleased. Psychologically, he still had a ways to go. He still jumped at loud noises, still hated crowds or being on his own, and he was terrified of the dark...but Frank was doing all he could to help him through things.

Frank was working from home most days now, though on rare occasions he still had to go into the studio he managed. Gerard usually went with him and stayed in his office with comics to read and music to listen to, but a couple of times that hadn’t been possible and he had reluctantly agreed to visit with Mikey and Pete. He was still a little nervous around them, but no more than he was around anyone who wasn’t Frank.

"What time did they say they were coming?"

Gerard asked softly as he set the table for their Thanksgiving meal. They had invited Mikey and Pete, and were going the whole nine yards with turkey, yams, cranberry sauce and all the other things they associated with the holiday. Frank paused as he stirred the sauce to look at his watch.

"They should be here any minute now. Have you taken your pills baby?"

"Mhmm..."

Gerard hummed and nodded.

"Ten minutes ago."

Dr. Urie had put Gerard on antidepressants and also given him some very mild sedatives to take if he knew he was going into a stressful situation...and God knows a family meal can certainly be that. Frank smiled gently at him before turning his attention back to the sauce he was making...he didn’t want it to burn. A couple of minutes later, there was a knock on the front door. Gerard jumped, a small squeak escaping his lips and his eyes going wide.

"It’s ok baby, it’s probably just Mikey and Pete. Could you take over here while I go let them in?"

Gerard let out a nervous giggle, forcing himself to relax as he took the spoon from Frank’s hand and accepted a soft kiss on the lips. Frank reached up to tuck a strand of Gerard’s hair behind his ear affectionately, then left the kitchen to go greet their guests. Gerard could feel his heart racing, but it was starting to calm down. Familiar voices drifted to his ears as he concentrated on stirring the pot. Three sets of footsteps approached the room, then entered.

"Hi Gee, happy Thanksgiving."

Gerard turned his head and smiled shyly at his brother.

"Hi. Yeah, happy Thanksgiving to you t-too Mikey, Pete."

"We brought pie!..."

Pete exclaimed with a big grin on his face as he held out two covered pie dishes proudly.

"I made them myself!"

"You baked?!..."

Frank asked incredulously...but with a smirk twitching at his lips.

"Are they edible?"

"Asshole..."

Pete muttered with a pout, though he knew Frank was only teasing.

"Of course they're edible...they’re chocolate cream."

Frank grinned wide, making grabby hands for the pies which made everyone laugh.

"Thanks Pete. I’m glad you didn’t do pumpkin, I think I’ve had enough of that to last a lifetime."

Pete chuckled.

"No problems, I knew you’d prefer chocolate anyway..."

He turned to Gerard with a grin.

"You too Gee."

Gerard looked up shyly as he took the sauce off of the stovetop.

"Thank you P-Pete. I l-love chocolate."

Frank slid the pies into the fridge, noting that one cover had his and Gerard’s name on, while the other said Mikey & Pete, with the word rum in brackets. He then moved to Gerard’s side, gently placing his hand on the small of the younger man's back, steadying him.

"I think we’re nearly ready. Why don’t you guys go sit down, Gee and I will be through in a minute."

Mikey and Pete agreed and headed through to the dining room.

"Th-thanks Frankie. I j-just need a moment."

Frank smiled softly, kissing Gerard’s cheek.

"Take all the time you need baby, I’m right here."

After a few minutes of Gerard calming his breathing and Frank tending to the last few things they needed for dinner, they both took a couple of serving dishes each and headed through to join Mikey and Pete.

*  
*  
*

"Oh my God, I’m _soooo_ full!...I don’t think I could manage another bite."

Frank groaned, leaning back in his chair to rub his belly. Mikey chuckled.

"Same, but it was good. You sure you never cooked a turkey before Frank?"

Frank shook his head, a satisfied and sleepy grin on his face.

"Nope, first time..."

He looked at Gerard who looked to be a minute away from slipping into a food coma. He smiled fondly.

"You ok there baby?"

"Huh?...oh, yeah. Just full."

Frank reached over and took Gerard’s hand, lifting it to his lips to press a soft kiss to his knuckles.

"Why don’t you go sit down and rest a while...I’ll clear up."

Gerard was struggling to keep his eyes open. He felt blissfully full.

"M'kay."

He mumbled, but made no effort to move. Frank chuckled, realising that he didn’t really feel much like getting up himself either. He looked over at Pete.

"That really was a great pie. You’ll have to give me the recipe."

Pete smirked.

"You liked it?..."

He watched Frank’s eyes flutter, then looked at Gerard to see that his eyes were already closed and his head was flopped back onto the back of the chair. Frank nodded sleepily.

"That’s good. I was worried that I put too much sedative in and you’d be able to taste it."

Frank frowned and struggled to open his eyes...he couldn’t have heard that right...right?

"Huh?"

He mumbled unintelligibly, feeling his consciousness slipping away. He heard the scrape of chair legs against the wooden floor, then felt warm breath against his right ear.

"You see Frank, we thought you would give up looking for Gerard last time..."

Mikey said quietly, his fingers playing with Frank’s hair absentmindedly.

"We thought we wouldn’t have to deal with you, but you just wouldn’t let it go."

Pete moved to Frank’s left and leaned in to murmur in his ear.

"Finding Bob was a wonderful bit of luck for us. He wanted you and hated Gerard, so he was the perfect person to take the blame."

"And now..."

Mikey whispered, caressing Frank’s cheek with his fingertips.

"We have you both."

Frank felt a tear slip from his eye to roll down his cheek as darkness descended on him...he didn’t know why this was happening, but somehow he knew that he and Gerard would never see the light of day again.

 

 

 

_THE END!_


End file.
